Tuesday, July 15, 2014

A Step You Can't Take Back

Last week I wrote about the movie Begin Again and talked about the concept of being Lost Stars, which was a song from the film. This past Saturday I saw it again with my son Will (it was even better the 2nd time!) and was struck with a different song- and more specifically, its' title. Keira Knightly sings A Step You Can't Take Back in the opening scene and I simply have not been able to get those words out of my head. A step you can't take back...

It seems to me there are two kinds of steps you can't take back. The first are the kind that propel us forward into the unknown and the uncertain. Often, we are so tentative and passive in our approach to life that we only take steps from which we know there is a means of retreat. If things don't work out, we just back up. The steps that propel us into passion, adventure and quite often the will of God are usually the ones from which we cannot give up on. One step leads to another in such situations, and all steps lead us forward. As an example from my own life, I recently began writing a novel. That was a step, but one that I could give up on at a moment's notice with no repercussions. Announcing that I was writing that novel and asking for your support and encouragement was a step I can't take back. It's out there now, and I am being held accountable for my words. The only way to go is forward. Sometimes in our lives it is only through those types of steps that we grow, change and discover what life has to offer us. Those are very good, very healthy and very important steps.

The other style of a step you can't take back is not quite so positive. They are the words you say or the actions you take without considering their impact on the people around you. We've all done it- trying to pull the words back into our mouths even as we are speaking them, or trying to undo an action that we realize immediately (or much later) has been harmful of hurtful to someone we care about. In this age of social media, it is easy to type out our fears and frustrations in a moment of anger or panic without remembering that once they are out there, they are OUT there! God forgives and forgets our transgressions. People may forgive us, but they seldom forget. These sorts of steps we can't take back often impact our relationships in very negative ways for a very long time.

My problem is I so seldom take either kind of step. I am cautious to a fault when it comes to jumping into things or to expressing my feelings. I despise hurting people I care about, which is good- unless it keeps me from being honest with them. I fear failure, which often keeps me from taking any giant steps from which I cannot retreat. There is nothing wrong with living a safe, controlled life- unless it means you are missing the life God is calling you to live. 

I know I have rambled today, but that's because I am feeling led to take some steps that I KNOW I cannot take back. I want to express some feelings about life to people who may not want to hear what I have to say. I want to pursue some things God is putting on my heart that will be scary and bold adventures. So pray for me, please. There is one thing for certain about taking a step you can't take back. You'd better be ready to live with the outcome...

Because of Jesus,

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