Crossroads

Happy Veteran's Day to all of the women and men who serve or have served our country, and especially to their families, who often sacrifice even more...may God bless you all!

The Summer of '86 found me quite busy planning the August annual Young Friends Yearly Meeting sessions and the 1986-87 school year events and programs.  My occasional thoughts of leaving New England and heading back to North Carolina were tempered by reality.  If I went back, what job would I be able to find?  If I left after such a short tenure, wasn't I just feeding into the statistics that said youth ministers never stay?  I wanted nothing to do with adding to the "17 month" stat- the average length of stay in a ministry position for a youth worker in those days.  Most importantly, I believed God had sent me to NEYM for a reason, and I was not ready to give up on my mission yet unless God was ready for me to move on.

The other side of my brain would argue that I was stuck in a job I didn't really like doing ministry with people I didn't understand.  Planning for Yearly Meeting ran me headlong into more issues and roadblocks that simply blew my mind.  Every discussion seemed to be about political correctness and theological inclusiveness.  Jesus was left out of the mix at every turn.  The committee spent one whole planning session talking guidelines for behavior for the students who would attend.  The debate centered around the fact the boyfriends and girlfriends could not room together or have public displays of affection, but nothing prevented gay and lesbian couples from sharing a room.  The discussion was heated, with the suggestion actually made that we just drop ALL rooming guidelines.  It was surreal.  They didn't see any real need for speakers, or music, or worship at the sessions.  Just good "hang out" time, with some workshops on social justice issues.  More and more I found myself turning to Chris Jorgensen for answers, and more and more I wondered why she didn't get the job to begin with...

Marilyn and I were set to be married on August 30th, just a few weeks after Yearly Meeting.  She was being a trooper about the whole thing, but it was clear to me she had no real desire to live in Massachusetts.  But she would...for me, and for my ministry.  There seemed to be no clear option, and praying for guidance was all I could do.  Then one day in June, I checked my mail and discovered a letter from my old friend Wallace Sills (see Starting A Riot) in NC.  Wally informed me that he was leaving his position as Youth and Christian Education Director at Springfield Friends Meeting in High Point, and that he hoped I would be interested in applying.  The application and interview process would take them up to the end of August...our wedding.  It was exciting news, but also complicating.  Would starting such a process give Marilyn false hope of getting to stay in NC?  As usual, I thought my chances of actually getting the position were not good. Plus, as I looked into the situation at Springfield I discovered that Wallace was leaving under bad circumstances and taking part of the congregation with him to Jamestown Friends. Simply exchanging one bad situation for another didn't seem like much of a plan.  And what of my commitment to the Young Friends of New England?  I didn't want to run out on them.  I wanted God to send me a sign- because I was too blind to see that the presence of Chris and the letter from Wallace as answers to prayer.   I wanted a burning bush, singing angels or a visit from a prophet.  I wanted God to speak.  Be careful what you ask for...

Because of Jesus,