|Conner J. Dog March 15, 2003 - August 16, 2015|
Monday, August 17, 2015
Rest In Peace, Conner Dog
Yesterday afternoon our beloved Conner Dog succumbed to heart failure and we had to have him put down. It was very sudden and very unexpected, with everything changing in the course of an hour. There were many tears, and it will be quite a while before the house feels normal again. We all got to give him final hugs and say our goodbyes, but it still doesn't feel real. He was part of our family for 12 years. All three of us have holes in our hearts.
There are lots of great Conner stories to tell, and over the next few weeks they will be told. But this post is all about how important that fuzzy little cocker spaniel was in my life. Many of you know that he was my constant companion over the past 8 years. He woke me up in the mornings, often far too early. We took 4 or 5 walks together every day. I fed him, and he played fetch with me. And he knew exactly what to do to pry an extra Beggin' Strip out of me. When I got McDonald's breakfast for the family, Conner got a Sausage McMuffin. He would lay his head on my thigh to beg for food. We GOT each other. He was my buddy.
But none of those things were his most important contribution to my life. When life fell apart for my family back in 2007 and we moved back to Tampa, I was very scared and alone. Marilyn and Will loved me, but they were gone to work and school every day. My neighbors were afraid of me. We had no internet and no social media, and this blog didn't exist yet. Almost no one even had my phone number because I assumed none of my friends would ever want to talk to me again. For the better part of 2 years I was alone all day, every day. Except for my faithful dog -he was always by my side. To Conner, I never stopped being a good guy and his love was totally unconditional, just as long as there was food. When Marilyn and Will took trips without me, Conner was always here. On days when it was hard to imagine life ever being good again, Conner would lick my elbow and beg to be rubbed. When ever I was tempted to give up, he was always pulling me out of my chair and taking me for a walk. Conner Dog was my life-support for nearly 2 years. And our bond was so strong because of it.
There is no replacing a family member like Conner. You don't move on and you don't get over it and you don't forget. You just remember- and love. We are thankful that he did not suffer. We are thankful that we got to say goodbye. And we know our lives will never, ever be quite the same. RIP, C-Doggy. I hope that doggy heaven is filled with endless Beggin' Strips. And maybe even your own ice cream bowl.