"They Gave Me a Lifetime Contract..."

The only thing I ever got to use the FLC  for-
a group picture.

I promised in a earlier post that I would not use this forum to tell everything I know about my final days at Wesley Memorial UMC- Tampa in 2005.   My forced resignation in June of that year was brought about primarily by my own actions, and though it was handled very poorly, it was the right thing to do.  But I do want to recall one story today that lets you know the state of things at WMUMC at the time of my departure, especially when it came to finances.


In late 2004 our pastor and the Staff-Parish Committee of the church came to me with an offer. They wanted to increase my responsibilities within the staff and place me in charge of both our part-time Children's Ministry Coordinator and our very part-time Pre-School Ministry Coordinator. In fact, my first task would be to fill those positions.  This increase in responsibility was matched with a large salary increase and a discussion of what my role at WMUMC might be if I ever decided to stop doing youth ministry full-time.  Their plan was to work with my job description to keep me around for a very long time.  I was excited.


At the same time, the church was finishing construction on a new million dollar Family Life Center.  On the surface, there was great excitement.  Behind the scenes, things were a disaster, and the church was getting ready to be in great financial distress.  A total lack of leadership had led to the building be built without a loan actually being secured and without the required sprinkler system (as a side note, I never got to use that building.  It finally opened 18 months or so after I left and the sprinklers were installed).  Our ministry budgets were stripped away, leaving me to find creative ways to finance previously planned events- like our March, 2005 trip to New York.  Just prior to the event, we received a $2000 gift from a church member to use at my discretion.  I went to the Finance Committee chair, and asked if instead of taking the cash to NYC I could just use the church credit card and then pay the bill from our money.  With the pastor standing right next to me listening to the entire conversation, he said "yes."  Several weeks later, after our trip, I was called into that same pastor's office and absolutely destroyed by that same man for using the credit card without permission.  When I implored both men to recall the previous conversation they looked at me like I was speaking Swahili.  Everything went downhill from there, and most of it was my fault.  But NOT the finances.  They came to me in mid-May and told me to resign, effective immediately.  I convinced them to let me stay through our planned Youth Week the first week in June. I told my family Memorial Day weekend at Walt Disney World that we had to be out of our church-owned home by June 15th.  It was a nightmare.


I can look back at my 4 years at WMUMC with fondness because of the opportunity I had to serve so many great students and to work with an amazing group of adults on the Youth Ministry Team.  I enjoyed working with many of the staff members.  We accomplished a lot in the name of Jesus, and Graceland had become a place of refuge for students from all over northwest Hillsborough county.  I am very sorry that my time there ended the way it did, and that I hurt and disappointed people along the way.  I am also sorry that the church used my departure as an excuse for another budget cut, having not paid a youth pastor a living wage since.  So as I bid farewell (at least temporarily) to my stories of our Wesley years, I'll use the words of the late, great Jimmy Valvano to sum up my final year at WMUMC- "They gave me a lifetime contract...and then they declared me dead."  But praise God, we are a Resurrection People, and many of our wonderful friends from those days are coming back into our lives, and our story together continues.  As the scripture says in James 1:2, "Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds..."


Because of Jesus,

CCM Thursday: The Late Great PFR

Back in early 2010 I did a countdown for this blog of the 50 Contemporary Christian Music (CCM) projects that had the most impact on my life and ministry (through 2007).  You can see that list here.  When I began the countdown I decided to leave off live albums and greatest hits collections.  In doing so, I chose to leave off one of my all time favorite projects, The Late Great PFR.  Today I want to share this classic collection with you.


PFR is a band that began as the group Pray For Rain in 1991, only to discover that an instrumental group already had claimed that name.  They shortened their name to PFR and became one of the most influential Christian bands of the mid-1990s.  I first encountered them at a National Youth Workers Convention in Nashville in 1995 and was blown away by their creative lyrics and awesome arrangements. I quickly bought all of their CDs and became a big fan.  In 1998 they announced they were breaking up and issued a greatest hits collection.  It is still easily one of my top 10 listened to albums.  It contained 13 classics and 3 brand new songs, and I love them all.  Songs like Great Lengths, Pray For Rain, Anything, Wait For the Sun, Fare Thee Well and the classic Goldie's Last Day are staples on my I-pod.  For me, their vocal blend and creative songs made them the Beatles of CCM.  You can hear their biggest hit, That Kind of Love, by watching the video below.  If you don't know PFR, then you are missing out on some amazing music. They have gotten back together a couple of times since 2000, and still perform together.  But they will be hard pressed to ever top the songs featured on The Late Great PFR.  Here's the playlist:
1)  Great Lengths                              9)  Pray For Rain
2)  Pour Me Out                               10)  Wonder Why
3)  Name                                           11)  The Love I Know
4)  Walk Away From Love              12)  Do You Want to Know Love
5)  Forever                                        13)  Merry Go Round
6)  Anything                                     14)  That Kind of Love
7)  Spinnin' Round                           15)  Wait For the Sun
8)  Goldie's Last Day                        16)  Fare Thee Well


Have a blessed day, everyone- and don't forget to "pray for rain to come and wash away what has made you numb!"

7 Things: Wesley Memorial Edition

Though it did not end well,  the time I served Wesley Memorial UMC in Tampa (October 2001 - June 2005) is very special to me.  Lots of amazing students, parents, events and moments stand out in my mind, but today I want to remember 7 Things that will always be special to me about those years.  Not included but ALWAYS remembered are the 2 Lost And Found concerts, the trips, the dozens of lunches at Lee Garden Chinese Restaurant and the many dinners at Kado Japanese Steakhouse.  They were all magical.  Here we go:

1. My interview for the job, when student Kyle Bell asked me, "How do you feel about dating?" - and I answered, "I don't know, we just met..."  It turned out the previous YP thought dating was evil, and Kyle was just making sure of my position!
2. The Sunday afternoon in 2005 we took a group out to a local beach and filmed our very own music video for the Ian Eskelin song Save the Humans. We had a great time, got lots of odd looks from other beach-goers, and eventually Pat O'Brien made a very cool video out of the footage.  Like so many other things I have, it is still on VHS.  Maybe someday I'll get it transfered into a digital format...
3. A Youth Ministry Team Christmas party at Bahama Breeze, an incredibly popular restaurant in Tampa.  We somehow managed to squeeze 20 of us around a table for 12 as all kinds of people we didn't think could make it showed up- and we had an amazing meal anyway.  It was always very important to me to take care of my volunteers.
4. Walking to the Virgin Megastore in Times Square on our 2005 NYC trip with Nina Mock, Justin Overstreet and others at 2 AM.  It was just one of those great moments of indescribable fellowship that I will always treasure. Sticking Virgin price tags to Nina (Virgin SALE: $9.99!) was just the icing on the cake!
5. Leading a prayer service for Robin Smith, one of our volunteers, as she prepared to go in for a last gasp artificial insemination for she and her husband Ed.  The pastor couldn't be there, so I led her co-workers from the church's preschool in a laying on of hands.  It was a powerful prayer time, and her beautiful twin girls are a testimony to God's faithfulness.
6. The night I drove Jacquie Thomson home from a youth event and she began to cry as she told me how fat she felt.  Jacquie was one of the smartest, talented and most beautiful young women it was ever my pleasure to have in a youth group, and to hear her in such pain over the ridiculous expectations of others just tore me up.  We talked a lot that night, and later on she remained a faithful part of our ministry long after most of her friends had moved on.
7. The final week.  I especially remember the great day we had at DisneyQuest before breaking down on the way home and having one of the students- Ryan Dittmar - save the day!  I remember the moment I realized that one of our newer Youth Ministry Team members, Lisa Jewett, was going to be the person to lead the group forward while they searched for a new YP- and I was so right.  She would also become one of my closest friends.  And I remember loosing Kevin Cook.  We had one final Rec Around the Clock, and an hour after everyone went home and I locked up the church, Kevin was reported missing.  After a quick search, we found him asleep on the front pew in the sanctuary.  Ahhhh...youth ministry!!!

So many memories, so many blessings.  I'll wrap up the tales of my years at WMUMC on Friday with a look back at how it all ended.  Until then...

Because of Jesus,

How Do You View God?

I have always believed that how we picture God has a tremendous impact on our faith.  Whether it be through bad teaching, bad theology or simple misunderstanding, many of us see God as having attributes that simply do not exist.  We talk about the "God of the Old Testament" as if God has a split personality, failing to realize that Jesus is the New Covenant who changed everything.  This is crucial, because the way we view God influences the way we think God views us.  Take a look at the list below and see if any of these "personas" of God have ever found their way into your thinking...


God as Darth Vader - Do what God tells you to do and everything will be cool.  Lose one rebel ship because it jumped to light speed and feel the cold hand of doom on your shoulder.  God does not like failures...
God as Genie - Your wish is God's command!  Some people call this prayer, but we all know it's all about telling God what you need want and waiting for Him to deliver.  Plus, there is none of that silly 3 wish limit stuff!
God as Judge Judy - Break a law and you will pay.  There will no mercy for law breakers, especially if it happens to be one of the Top 10.  If God catches you coveting your neighbor's key lime pie, you might as well pack your bags for hell...
God as Grumpy Old Man - God is not actually in control of things anymore.  He just sits in the recliner and complains about the state of things on earth and how no one listens to Him anymore.  Occasionally yells at the young folks to "Get off my lawn!"  
God as Bartender - God is always there to listen, to ease your pain, and to give you a little something to take the edge off.  But He's not really gonna' do anything about it.
God as Cosmic Killjoy - Does something look like fun?  Then God doesn't like it.  He wants you to be solemn and miserable.  Everything that sounds like a good time must be against His rules.  That's why soccer, rap & disco succeeded- absolutely nothing fun about those things.  :)
God as Financial Advisor - We should give freely to our churches and TV evangelists, not because we want to give back to God but because if we do He will make us wealthy beyond our wildest dreams!  So you don't forget, order your autographed Last Supper Menu before midnight tonight and you will be blessed!
God as Life of the Party - You hang with God, and life will be all sunshine and parties.  No sadness, no struggles and no worrying about people who might need your help.  God will keep you smiling and smelling good!


Do any of those sound familiar to you?  Or do you have your very own view of God?  Before you answer, here's one more I left out...


God as BFF - Need to be held accountable?  God can do that.  Need someone to lean on when the world has got you down?  God is always there.  Need to be convicted of your sins?  He's the One for the job.  Need to be loved unconditionally?  God is the ONLY one who will do that.  In John 15:14-15  Jesus says, "You are my friends if you do what I command.  I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead, I have called you friends..."  The great worship band Delirious expressed it like this:  "What a friend I've found, closer than a brother. It would break our hearts to ever lose each other...Jesus, friend forever."  God came to us in human form so that we would know how much he loves us- and that's what the Jesus Revolution is all about.  You want to know how much he cares about you?  Read Luke 12:6-7.  He knows everything about you and loves you more than you can imagine.  The creator of the universe (YAWEH) loves us like a daddy (ABBA).  How amazing is that...


So let me ask you again- How do you view God?


Because of Jesus,

Hall of Fame: The Class of '09

Cullen & Colton

Normally I am not a fan of the word "potential."  I have seen too many times over the years when that word used to trap and place unrealistic expectations on people.  We all have the potential for improvement, and in that sense it is a great thing.  But is some cases- say, for instance, when a teenager is giving algebra her absolute best effort, but is weighed down by a parent's thought that she has the potential to be an "A" student- it can be quite a burden.  It seems we often fail to live up to our potential in the eyes on those who proclaim we have it...

Alex, Lexi & Ariel with "The Clause"

Having said all of that, when the Class of '09 arrived as 6th graders in the student ministry of Wesley Memorial UMC in August of 2002, I could not help but marvel at the potential they had to completely revitalize our ministry.  We had been lacking in 3 areas during my first year at WMUMC- leadership, enthusiasm and numbers.  This class had the potential to fix all three.  As a youth pastor, I could not help but be excited by this gang, which had been very active in the children's ministry.  I thought of all of them as having the potential to be in my Youth Group Hall of Fame someday.  There were just so many of them who would become the core of Graceland over the next three years.  Alexis Woods, Zach Wehr, Alexandra Smith, Cullen O'Brien, Matt Preston, Skyler Rogers, Ariel Ringo, Corie Champion, Colton Myers, Meagan Dennis, Richard Fenimore, Melissa Nelms and their friends simply transformed the group.  They hit the ground running and never stopped, bringing much needed energy.  Even the high school kids just stood back and watched in awe as "the wave" swept over us.

Zach, ???? & Matt in action!

They also brought leadership.  Alexis and Zach were incredibly spiritually mature right from the start, asking good questions, serving on mission trips and helping to involve their friends. Alexandra, Matt, Cullen and Skyler always kept me on my toes as well.   This group didn't just "show up" for Graceland; they thrived there.  By the time they were 8th grade students in the 2004-05 school year, they were the backbone of the ministry in many ways.


In the end, the long term potential of that talented group to completely change the student ministry of WMUMC was wasted, but that was my fault- not theirs.  I resigned (because I was asked to) in late May of 2005, so I did not get to spend the high school years with this bunch.  I have heard from a few of them, and had lunch with Zach (who I know reads this) and his girlfriend and mom a couple of months back- but most of them are no longer part of my life.  And I miss them.  I have no doubt that together we could have accomplished much, and so today I honor them- all of them- by inducting the entire WMUMC Class of '09 into my Youth Group Hall of Fame.  You are no longer just potential Hall of Famers- you are there.  Blessings to all of you!


Because of Jesus,

A Day In the Life of a Youth Pastor

I was captured in action on a
Mission Trip- Nashville '99

Much of this post previously appeared on my other (now dormant) blog.  It appears here today by request.

One of the most commonly asked questions of Youth Pastors is this- "What do you do all day?"  It is usually asked by the youth themselves, but occasionally by their parents, the congregation, or under rare and very dangerous circumstances, by the Senior Pastor (TIP: If your SP is asking, it's time to polish up the old resume!).  I spent 28 years doing the job, and I can tell you that the answer is much more complicated than most people might realize.  I submit to you today that Youth Pastors are usually the most under-appreciated staff member in our churches. In fact, for myself (and I suspect many other Youth Pastors who have worked in small to medium sized churches) the real answer to the question is...EVERYTHING!

To show you what I mean, let me give you a list of some of the things I was asked to do during any given month at the churches I served. My tasks included, but were not limited to:

• Planning, directing and executing everything related to student ministry.  This usually takes no more than 80 hours a week...
• Serving as the fill-in preacher on rare scheduled occasions and every time the Senior Pastor woke up sick at 6 AM Sunday morning.  No one can "wing it" quite like a Youth Pastor!
• Having office hours.  These exist for 2 reasons.  One, so youth (and some parents) can stop by and hang out and talk to you about things both important and unimportant. Two, so the rest of the church staff has a place to hang out and complain.  My office was always the one with candy...
• Driving the church van for the senior citizens groups and women's groups of the church.  Why me?  Because I had logged thousands of miles in those vans without incident- and because they knew I would say yes after the Senior Pastor turned them down.
• Playing guitar & leading music during worship when the Contemporary Worship leader was sick or off interviewing at a church that was actually contemporary.
• Teaching the staff how to use word processing programs, data bases and graphic design software.  In later years, building and maintaining the church website.  I knew very little about computers, but "very little" made me the expert of some of those staffs.
• Make the wild, creative and envelope pushing suggestions that really rattled staff meetings- then smile as your suggestions were discarded.
• Bringing creativity to worship.  I wrote and directed dramas, made videos, introduced new music and taught volunteers how to run Media Shout.  And then when they didn't show up, I ran Media Shout!
• Support the Senior Pastor in his/her ministry.  With some pastors this was easy.  With others (like The Pastor Who Shall Not Be Named & Reverend Not-Appearing-in-this-Blog) , it was a matter of gritting your teeth and forgetting that they had just thrown you under the bus...again.
• Setting up the sound system in the Fellowship Hall for daytime events because no one else on the staff ever learned how (TIP: Stop learning how to do stuff).
• Make suggestions about making the worship service more relevant for teenagers, only to be looked at like you just suggested actually singing the 3rd verse of a hymn...
• Be the one person on staff who worked most every holiday and all summer long, because that's when students have the most available time.
• Fulfill the final line of every Youth Pastor job description- "and whatsoever other duties as determined by the Senior Pastor and the Personnel Committee."  In other words, everything no one else wants to do!

Please understand- I am not complaining. I loved being in ministry for all those years, and I am sure my brothers and sisters in student ministry feel the same way.  But I also hope you understand that being a Youth Pastor is hard work.  They don't just sit around all day thinking of new ways to ruin the Jones Memorial Carpet or spend all of the church's money.  They deal with screwed-up families, broken relationships and one of the largest mission fields around.  They plan trips, go to ball games, concerts and dance recitals (you will feel their pain when you sit through a 3 hour recital to watch 1 student dance).  They study, pray and prepare to lead programs.  And many of them- in my experience, the VAST majority- do all of these things in a spirit of love and service, because they want so badly for people to know Jesus. So if you know a Youth Pastor, show them some love today.  If you are one, please know you are loved and appreciated.

So there you go.  A day in the life of a Youth Pastor is never, ever boring.  And it was, for me, a blessing beyond anything I can describe.  But that is life with Jesus, isn't it?  Wild, crazy, unpredictable and a greater joy than anything you thought possible.  Have a great Saturday!

Because of Jesus,

Are You a Doomsayer or a Doomslayer?

The concepts of "Doomsayer" and "Doomslayer" contained in this post came from some notes I had in a very old file. I would love to give credit to the original speaker, but I simply don't know who it was. I can only say, "Thank you" and praise God for the inspiration all of these years later...

More and more these days I read articles and blogs that seem to take a negative view of our future here on planet earth.  They are worried about the end of the world, terrorism, our economy and so much more. Much of this writing comes from people who call themselves Christians, and this concerns me.  At a time when so much of the world has become consumed with the end of times and being Doomsayers, we who know Jesus should be positioning ourselves as Doomslayers.  While others find their hearts hardened with fear, hatred and distrust, we need be a people who have had our hearts (to borrow a phrase from G.K. Chesterton) "hardened with hope."  If those who believe in a risen Christ do not have hope in this world how can we expect anyone else to?  Just recently I had a longtime believer write to me talking about how evil this world is, and that there seems to be no hope for good.  Her point was that "things are bad now, and will only get worse.  We don't know what the future holds."  


Actually... YES we do!


We know exactly what the future holds.  Paul wrote that there is nothing- NOTHING!- "that can separate us from the love of God that is Christ Jesus our LORD."  We know that whatever we may face, the power of the Cross can meet the challenge.  We may not know where the twists and turns our journey here on earth may lead us, but we know where the road ends.  God wins!  We may not see what the future holds, but we know WHO holds the future.  And in that future, these things are true:
* The lion will lie down with the lamb.
*  The wicked will cease their troubling.
*  The weary will find rest.
*  There will be no more tears, no more sorrow, no more hatred.
*  There will be no more hunger and no more war.


So in this world of Doomsayers, it is time for the Church to rise up and be the beacon of hope that Jesus wants us to be.  We need to help our friends and neighbors discover the abundant life now (John 10:10) and the eternal life forever (John 3:16).  It's time to be a Doomslayer! How? Like this...

• To those who feel weary and unloved, we say, "Jesus loves me- this I know!"
• To those who feel lost, we say, "Jesus is the Way, the Truth and the Life."
• To those who have lost faith, we say, "Jesus is the same today, yesterday and forever!"
• To those who put their faith in a political party or movement, we say, "There is only one King of Kings and LORD of Lords who guides us."
• To those who have lost their way, we say, "Jesus is the light of the world!"
• To those who have lost their joy, we sing, "Joy to the world!  The LORD is come!"

Far too many of us stand in church each weekend and sing "Our God Saves" or "Our hope is built on nothing less than Jesus' blood and righteousness," and then go out and live our lives in the chains forged by the Doomsayers.  It's time to pick a side.  Will we join the mighty chorus of doom that is echoing through our land?  Or will will join the great cloud of witnesses proclaiming in a loud and mighty voice, "Tis so sweet to trust in Jesus" and carrying his overwhelming message of hope to our communities. I cannot speak for anyone else, but as for me, I choose to harden my heart with hope.  I choose to be a Doomslayer.  I choose Jesus.


Because of Jesus,