One Very Long Decade

Ten years ago today I had loaded up my Ford Taurus station wagon and was leaving Tampa for my new ministry in Waycross, GA. My first few months in Waycross were going to be hard, as Marilyn and Will remained behind so Will could finish 5th grade at his school. Still, I was excited to see what new adventures God had in store for me. I stopped at the Tampa Christian Bookstore on my way out of town to pick up a few things for my new office, and while there I received a phone call from my Mom. My Dad, who had been very sick for a couple of months, had passed away. Obviously my plans changed and my trip was delayed as we took care of my Mom and dealt with Dad's passing. Ten years ago today. My Dad is such a huge part of who I am, and I still miss him every day. In some ways it doesn't seem that long ago. And in some ways it has been a lifetime. These have been 10 very long years...

Why so long? Let me count the ways! I survived 5 months without my family, but just barely. Thirteen months after Dad's death my life fell apart. I lost my ministry and for a short period of time my freedom. We moved back to Tampa, where from 2007-2009 I was basically a hermit, certain no one outside of my family really wanted to see me. I was unable to find a job and felt pretty useless. Through the support of some great friends and this blog, I began to bounce back. Then in 2012 I was diagnosed with diabetes and had the big toe on my left foot amputated. In 2013 I lost 2 more toes, this time from my right foot. I was dealing with not only the disease but some emotional turmoil in my personal life as well, and life just got difficult. But with lots of support, love and encouragement I made it through the rain.

And then came Sunday, August 16, 2015. My beloved dog Conner, who had been my constant companion through so much of the decade, passed away. On Friday of that same week my best friend, Lisa Jewett, was diagnosed with ovarian cancer. On Saturday, Will moved out of the house for the first time and into his apartment at the University of Central Florida. Since that week much of my life has been spent caring for Lisa, visiting doctors, spending nights in hospitals and trying to take care of myself at the same time. Sharing life with her has been a true blessing, and her good news last week brought a smile to my heart. And then on January 30 we received a call that my mother had been taken to a Hospice House. On February 5, my Mom died. And somewhere in the midst of the pain it occurred to me that these 10 years had come full circle. It has been a kidney stone of a decade in many ways. My prayer is that it has now passed.

The Apostle Paul once wrote that in the end, 3 things remain- faith, hope and love. And that has certainly been my recipe for survival. I could tell you that my faith in God has never wavered, but that would be a bold faced lie. I have doubts every day. But my faith has never left me. My friends and family have shown faith in me, even when I didn't deserve it. Faith has helped keep me afloat. And because of my faith and the faith others have shown me, I always have hope. Even in the darkest of times there is hope for a better tomorrow, and that hope is always present in my heart. I may be down, but never out. Life hurts, but there are reasons to persevere. There are people who have given me hope to carry on. And I am blessed.

And love? Love is everything. The past 10 years have taught me that whatever the question, love is the answer! All the Sunday school cliches- God is love, Jesus loves me, love one another- are all absolutely true. It becomes clearer to me each and every day that life is about understanding that I am loved by so many people in so many ways, and that sharing that love with others is what makes the world go 'round! I know so many of you love me. I hope you know how much I love you.

So here's to the next 10 years! May they be full of love, light and joy. And may the peace that passes all understanding fill out hearts so that we will never be content with merely surviving. Let's get out there and truly live!!!

Because of Jesus,

Ring That Bell!

Yesterday, for the eighth time since late August, I drove my best friend Lisa Jewett to the Moffitt Cancer Center at International Plaza so she could receive chemotherapy for her stage 4 ovarian cancer. It's now hard to imagine that 5 months ago I had no idea such a place existed. And now- FINALLY! - she was arriving at the end of her treatments. Yesterday was the final chemo as prescribed by her oncologist. And it was a long, hard road for Lisa. The side effects can be brutal. She seldom feels "right," often being unable to explain exactly what feels "off" - she just knows something does. There have been trips to the Moffitt emergency treatment center. There have been post treatments shots, including one today. For years I had heard stories of friends who had to go through the process of chemo, and thought I knew how hard this would be for her. As is so often true, hearing and experiencing are two very different things. Over the 8 days of treatment, I estimate that Lisa spent nearly 40 hours in the infusion center having her body pumped full of healing liquids. She had been through so much to arrive at yesterday. And I know. I was there for every minute of those 40 hours. Her struggle has been very real. But yesterday it was time to cross a finish line- and celebrate the day!

It is a tradition in cancer centers for patients to ring a bell at the conclusion of their final chemo as a symbol of victory in the battle with cancer. And yesterday my dear friend Lisa got to ring that bell- and she did it with passion and conviction! Before she pulled the bell rope we circled up with the infusion staff (see picture below) and I prayed, thanking God for all that has been done through the medical staff and those who have given Lisa their love and support. 

We thanked God for her courage and willingness to do everything in her power to beat this hideous disease. And we prayed that God would now finish the healing process. I had barely uttered "Amen" when the bell rang out loud and clear! In fact, Lisa moved so fast no one got a picture of the actual bell ringing- we had to tell her to do it again! She was given a certificate of completion and the staff praised her attitude and her courage. They insisted I get in a picture and said some very nice things to me as well. Lisa's smile lit up the infusion center as the hugs began. Over these months the staff at Moffitt International not only took amazing care of Lisa, they became our friends. And every light is a storm is an important one...

So yesterday we celebrated. But there are still hurdles to cross and many prayers to be said. We go in this afternoon for a shot, and then next Thursday Lisa will have blood work and a CT scan. The following Thursday- February 11th - she meets with the doctor to hear the results and discover what lies ahead. We (and I say we often, even thought she is the one going through all of this, because to me it feels like "we") pray that the cancer will be gone and never return. We have faith that God has got this. Lisa is making plans for the future and will be moving back to her house soon, leaving the "home" that my house has become for her. So we move forward with hope, and Lisa covets your prayers for complete healing. 

Last night I thanked God for the opportunities I have been blessed with during this process. It has often been a difficult thing for me over these past years to have so much free time on my hands, sometimes feeling like there was no higher purpose in my life. Suddenly, because of all that available time, God gave me a ministry and a purpose. I have been reminded over and over again that words, even words as powerful as "I love you," are empty without actions that prove you mean it. It is my prayer that my presence in her life has been a blessing for Lisa; it is a certainty that it has been a blessing to me. And we're not done yet. But you see that smile on the beautiful lady to the left? That's enough to keep me going as long as I am needed! May our hearts overflow with love and thanksgiving today, and may each of our "inner bells" ring loud and proud for Lisa! Can I get a WOOHOO? :)

Because of Jesus,

Happy Birthday, Lisa!

As many of you know, this blog is currently on hiatus. When I started this break over a month ago, I reserved the right to post on special occasions without jumping back into blogging with both feet. Today is one of those special occasions. In fact, it is a MOST special occasion. Tonight a group of 7 of us are going to the premier of The Force Awakens at 8 pm. Will is here along with Michelle. Lisa Jewett and her son Scott are joining us and so is Michelle's brother Alex. We are all very excited! And THAT is the second most important thing about today...

You see today is Lisa Jewett's birthday. Seeing the movie tonight is only one of the celebrations planned for this weekend (several of them surprises!), and it is my prayer that it will all be amazing for her. Tomorrow she will head to St. Pete to spend the next 8 days with her oldest son and his family, including all 4 of her grandkids. I am so happy she is feeling good and gets that time with those precious children and her son. But we have not often been apart over the past 3 months, and I confess I am going to miss her terribly here at Chez Jones.

It is not unusual for people to say about a dear friend that "they are like part of the family." Lisa is much more than that to us. She IS part of our family. Will calls and texts with her on a regular basis to see how she is doing. Marilyn has welcomed her into our home and helped care for her. I spent 9 days and 8 nights by her side in the hospital after her surgery and have cared for her in our home over the past 28 days- and for many days before that during her chemo treatments. My friends- many of whom have never met her- text me often to inquire how she is feeling. I have made new friends as her friends and family texted me when she was unable to use her phone- and some of them continue to do so! Lisa is family.

As I spent that time with her in the hospital and have driven her to doctor's appointments, chemo treatments and various other things people quite naturally assume that I am her spouse or her boyfriend. When we laugh and reply, "No, we are just best friends" people look at us like we are lying. Nurses at Moffitt Cancer Center pulled me aside and questioned why I was staying with her 24/7 after the surgery, saying that "just friends" never did that- in fact, most families don't. My answer was simple- I stayed because my friend Lisa needed me to, and I am honored that she has trusted me enough to put herself in my care. In truth, I guess in some small way we are lying when we say "just friends." The word FRIEND is not nearly big enough, but our bond is very difficult to put into words. We are OHANA in the best sense of the word, and caring for her has never been a burden. It is a joy, and as I often tell her, a job I refuse to be fired from. She's stuck with me!

So Happy Birthday to my Lisa! I pray your day is filled with joy and peace, and that your weekend will be full of glorious surprises and smiling grandkids. And when you are ready to move back in with us after Christmas to prepare for more chemo, your room will be waiting for you. And so will your family!  We love you very much!!!

Because of Jesus,

It's the End of the Blog As We Know It...

November is upon us, and the next couple of months promise to be full of challenges and adventures. My work as chauffeur, personal assistant, official hand-holder and nurse to my dear friend Lisa Jewett will continue. After her surgery on the 10th she will be living with us for several weeks during her recovery period. On the 17th of the month Marilyn, Will and I will be seeing the original Beach Boy Brian Wilson live in concert in St. Pete. There's a phone upgrade in my future. Thanksgiving will be here before we know it. In December we will have Will at home on break for several weeks. There is the excitement of the Christmas season. And on the 18th Will, Marilyn, Michelle (and her brother Alex) and I will celebrate Lisa's birthday by seeing Star Wars: The Force Awakens - in 3D. Tickets have been purchased. Life is going to be interesting. But will it be blog-worthy?

Ecclesiastes 3:1 reminds us that, "There’s an opportune time to do things, a right time for everything on the earth..." The seasons of life keep turning. Since August 26, 2009 it has been the right time, as well as a pleasure and a blessing to write this blog. It has given me focus, a chance to dedicate myself to something worthwhile, and an opportunity to reconnect with many old friends. It has also helped bring new people into my life who have taught me much about grace and friendship. But now, after 1900+ posts, it feels like the right time to stop. It is simply a matter of inspiration- or a lack thereof. Lately there have been more and more recycled posts and deeper struggles with creating new material that are not too intensely personal. Everyday my heart and my mind turn to the same subjects and the same issues, and it feels like I am wearing them out. So today is the day. It's the end of this blog as we know it- and I feel fine.

From the beginning, this blog has been about the things Jesus has done and is still doing in my life. It's been about the people who mean the most to me and the events that have shaped me. I've shared my biggest failures, my joys and my sorrows, my pain and my happiness. I wrote a novel and shared it with you. I have shared stories of faith and doubt. Through this venue my life has been an open book. But now it is time for a new chapter. To paraphrase Olivia Newton-John, I love you guys- but right now we all know I've got somewhere else to go. Going forward, it is my hope that God will inspire me to reach out and to tell my stories in new ways. For the foreseeable future there will only be posts here if there is important news to share or respond to. You can still find me on Twitter, by e-mail (Youthguy07@aol.com) or by phone (813-919-3755). But until further notice this blog will still be here, but will remain dormant.

I want to take this opportunity to thank all of you who have supported me with comments, words of encouragement and simply by taking the time to read my words. It's been a great run. Please understand that this is not a bad thing- there is nothing wrong with me, nothing that is dragging me down. I just need some time and space for my head and my heart, and I have important work to do in the days ahead. I covet your prayers, and look forward to our future adventures together. Please stay in touch, and if it's not asking too much, "keep me in your heart for a while..."

Because of Jesus,

The "Dangerous Wonder" of Mike Yaconelli

Mike Yaconelli was killed in a car wreck on October 30, 2003. I've never met anyone who was quite like Yac. Co-founder of Youth Specialties and creator of the Ideas Books, he is considered by many to be the father of modern youth ministry- a title which he would have hated. He was much happier with his own description of himself as a man who had been kicked out of Bible College and was for the last few years of his life the pastor of the "slowest growing church in the country." I first met Yac at the YS National Youth Workers Convention in 1982, and I was immediately overwhelmed by his passion and his personality. His early morning bible studies at those events were legendary, and I seldom missed one. Over the years I fortunate enough to attend numerous seminars which he led, and we sat and talked on several occasions. His heart for Jesus was enormous; his love for youth workers knew no boundaries. Seldom does a day go by that I don't think of Yac.


I remember his stories about youth ministry and the ever-present Jones Memorial Carpet. I think about the time I was standing at the front desk of a fancy hotel that was hosting the NYWC, only to feel a finger-blaster go whizzing by my head and hit the clerk. I turned to see Yac laughing hysterically- having fired the shot! His story about serving communion using orange juice and stale hot dog buns inspired me to use OJ & Krispy Kreme doughnuts. I remember spending 2 days with him as part of a small group in a spiritual renewal seminar just soaking in prayer and scripture, being reminded how important it is to be still. No one who ever encountered Yac will ever forget him. Just before his death I made arrangements to have him deliver the Sunday message at the Tampa church I served at the time the following February. I couldn't wait to see the wild, messy and totally unpredictable Yac blow the roof off the place. That day was never to be...


Today, I want you all to understand that Mike Yaconelli was all about a dangerous faith.  He challenged everyone he encountered to step outside of their comfort zone and follow the radical teachings of the Christ. This passion often made him a critic of the institutional church and of corporate student ministry. The 3 quotes below are from his book Dangerous Wonder. They tell you a lot about Yac. They tell you even more about what is should mean to follow Jesus. Read them. Re-read them. My hope is that you will be overwhelmed by his words just as I have been- over and over again.  If they make you uncomfortable...GOOD!  Then I know I have used them well.  I have said before that I have known 2 men in my life that I know really "got" Jesus.  Rich Mullins was one.  Yac was the other.  I was blessed to have known him. Enjoy his words.


If Christianity is simply about being nice I'm not interested... I'm ready for a Christianity that "ruins" my life, that captures my heart and makes me uncomfortable. I want to be filled with an astonishment which is so captivating that I am considered wild and unpredictable and.. well... dangerous. Yes, I want to be "dangerous" to a dull and boring religion.  


How did we end up so comfortable with God? How did our awe of God get reduced to a lukewarm appreciation of God? How did God become a pal instead of a heart-stopping presence? How can we think of Jesus without remembering His ground-shaking, thunder-crashing, stormy exit on the cross? Why aren’t we continually catching our breath and saying, “This is no ordinary God!”?


It is time to find the place where the dangerous wonder of faith can be discovered—a place landscaped by risky curiosity, wild abandon, daring playfulness, quiet listening, irresponsible passion, happy terror, and naive grace. In a day when most of us are tired, worn-out, thirsty, and starving for life and joy and peace, maybe it is time to become a child again. Maybe it is time to quit college and take a year off to go to the mission field, or give up a secure job and go back to school, or leave the corporation because the work is killing our souls, or give up the possessions that are possessing us. Maybe it is time to live this dangerous wonder of faith, take our shoes off, roll up our sleeves, and have such a romp as no one has ever seen. Maybe it's time to play in the snow once again.


Because of Jesus,

Happy Halloween!

May your day be full of more treats than tricks, and may all your ghosts be friendly ones!

"Death...NOOOO..." (A Rant)

My son Will and I are huge movie buffs, and over the years we have developed our own "short hand" language, using lines from movies to make specific points to one another. One of our favorites comes from Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey, the mostly forgettable sequel to the most excellent Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure. In the plot of Bogus Journey (and I use the term "plot" extremely loosely here!) Bill & Ted are battling the Grim Reaper for the right to not be dead. Yeah, you read that right. In one scene that are playing charades with some aliens (again, I cannot make this stuff up) and the aliens are making some wild gestures and hand signals, seeming to indicate it is a movie. Suddenly the Grim Reaper blurts out a guess- "Butch and Sundance, the Early Years!" Bill & Ted look at their teammate, shake their heads in disbelief and utter this immortal line- "Death...NOOOO..."

Anytime Will or I see or hear something that seems so completely moronic, out of place or inappropriate that we cannot believe it just happened, we will look at each other and repeat that line. It happens more often than you might think. It is our way of saying "I can't believe you just went there!" 

So what does this have to do with anything? I read a blog a while back from a guy I will call Kevin- because that is his name. I refuse to tell you more than that because I do not want to send traffic to his blog. (As a side rant, are there any other 3-2-1 Penguins fans out there who have trouble saying the name "Kev-innn" with a straight face?) In a post about the current state of the Christian church in USAmerica, he made the following statement:  

"The Jesus found in scripture would act differently and teach differently if he were in 21st century America. He would be much more conservative, much more restrained. He would focus more on sin and less on loving one another. The church needs to realize that just as Jesus would have a different focus, so must we. We need to preach hell fire and damnation. People need to understand that an angry Jesus is waiting to judge us.  Talk about grace all you want to, but trust me- we will all be judged."

"Death...NOOOO..."

We cannot re-write the teachings of Jesus (GOD!) just because they seem out of step with the church of today. Instead we must change our churches to be more in step with the radical, ridiculous love and grace of Jesus Christ. We are promised in scripture that he is the same yesterday, today and forever. I try really hard not be judgmental of others, but in this case, I believe Kevin has earned the coveted Green Weenie Award for representing the WORST the church has to offer our world. In fact, I would suggest to Kev that he check out the urban translation of Proverbs 10:19- "Speak not at all, because you are gonna' say something stupid!"

My prayer today is that God will grant me the wisdom and the strength to follow and represent the REAL Jesus. The one who came to save us, not condemn us. The one who taught us that whatever the question, love is the answer. The one who gave birth to the Church so that we might follow him, not so we can mold him to our beliefs. Thank you for loving me, Jesus.  And forgive me for my judgment of Kevin.

Because of Jesus,