Ego Goggles



The youth leading worship at Promiseland

 Wesley Memorial UMC in Tampa was a wonderful church when I arrived there in 2001, and I loved the 4 years I spent as their Director of Student Ministries.  But there was one issue I discovered early on in my time there that put a damper on some of our efforts to make the youth ministry everything we wanted it to be.  The church leaders- those in positions of power- viewed the church as much larger and much more stable than it actually was.  You know how bar patrons are accused of having "Beer Goggles" when they think someone is better looking after a few drinks?  At WMUMC I think we had Ego Goggles.  We saw things the way we wanted them to be so we could be seen as successful.  And perhaps no one had bigger Ego Goggles than yours truly, because no one had bigger dreams that I did.  But I was far from alone.  Let me explain.

There were lots of things about Wesley that were a little misleading to the naked eye.  They had a wonderful children's Sunday School program called Promiseland that was a little over a year old when I arrived.  The staff and the church were exceedingly proud of it.  But in truth, Promiseland had been brought to WMUMC, organized and to a great extent financed by one amazing couple- George and Jennifer Woods.  They had recruited great teachers and other helpers, but it would have never have happened without them.  Another ministry the church was very proud of was called Naomi's Daughters, a weekly meal and program for single mothers.  Again, this was a marvelous outreach and ministry- but the vision for it came from a group of women who did it without any help from the church.  The church provide space and helped provide meals on occasion, but the ministry itself was not a ministry of WMUMC.  It should have been a warning when 2 of the best ministries of the church actually received very little financial support from budget- but we had our Ego Goggles on.

Construction of the FLC

In fact, after salaries were paid and the electricity was kept on, there was very little money for actual ministry included in the church budget.  This only got worse as the efforts to build a new Family Life Center increased the financial strain.  I was excited about the FLC.  It would have a youth room (which we did not have) and a full gymnasium (which no one in the community had) and in my mind, through my Ego Goggles, this building could make Graceland THE place for student ministry in northwest Tampa.  I didn't pray about needing it, I just prayed about getting it.  I didn't really even think  through all of the ramifications. I just wanted that building.  So did our pastor the other church leaders. And so, over the loud cries of long-time members who could see without Ego Goggles, we built a multi-million dollar building for a church that already had precious little money for ministry.  I was about to find out in the summer of 2003 that just because the church budget said that there was money for youth ministry didn't actually mean that there WAS money for us to use, or that I would be able to use it in the way I saw fit.  People who had no idea what student ministry was about were getting ready to tell me how to do my job.  For really the first time in my 25 years of working for churches, the financial tail was getting ready to wag the ministry dog, and I wasn't going to like it.   To say there were going to be some issues is the understatement of the year... (to be continued Wednesday)

Because of Jesus,

Live, Laugh & Love

Front Row: Melissa Hanbery, Lorelei Hanbery, Marilyn Jones, Lisa Kraus Spires, Caitlin Esry
Back Row:  Jerry Hanbery, Will Jones, Julia Pribyl, Bethany Esry
Not Pictured (because she left early!): Jennifer (Bob) Minnigan Kuramochi

I had lunch with the group pictured above at The Green Iguana here in Tampa yesterday.  They drove in from all over Central Florida to see each other- and me.  These folks were all a part of our student ministry at FUMC-Kissimmee between 1994-2000, and are all very important to me.  I want to share a few thoughts about the 3 wonderful hours we shared together on Saturday.

Anytime you gather a group of people whose primary connection to one another was over a decade ago you run the risk of spending the entire time re-living old stories (of which there are many).  And we did tell a few war stories.  We talked about Jerry (who was my intern in those years) running naked through parking lots (only happened twice, according to him).  We talked about Lisa and the mission trip she spent being one of "the Craft Nazis."  But mostly we spent the time talking about their lives right now.  Bethany (who, BTW, won yesterday's trivia contest- Carowinds!) explained to us exactly what she does (and it's quite impressive!) now that she lives in Yonkers, NY, and told us of her upcoming wedding.  Caitlin talked about her teaching in St. Cloud and the fact that she just found out her contract has been renewed for next year (a big deal in Florida, where the new governor is crushing the education budget).  Jennifer and Lisa talked about being pregnant and the wonders of stretchy pants, and Jenn caught us up on the sushi restaurant she and her husband manage.  They now deliver- and one of their new customers is a strip club, much to the surprise of the delivery guy!  Julia caught us up on her current life and some future plans.  Jerry told stories of his current job search (he's an attorney), and we admired Melissa (who was meeting many of these folks for the 1st time) for being a saint- simply for being married to Jerry!  And Marilyn, Will and I soaked it all in.

It was a good thing that The Green Iguana was mostly empty that time of day, because we were not a quiet table.  We laughed.  A lot.  And very, very loudly.  We laughed at the old stories, the new stories, the silly comments and Lorelei.  And mostly, we laughed with and at Jerry.  Just like old times, he was the life of the party.  And just like old times, everyone was immediately comfortable with each other all over again.  I was reminded again just how much spiritual power there can be in laughter and the act of just "hanging out."

In the end, what brings us together, what bonds us together and what always brought us together is love.  The relationships we built all those years ago still ring true, because they were built in love.  This group was by no means a gathering of long-time best friends.  Some of these folks barely knew each other in the Kissimmee days.  Some see each other often, some barely at all.  The ones who were students at that time went to 4 different high schools and had a wide variance in age.  But because we shared those years seeking God, building a history and loving one another, our bond is as strong as ever.  We're still not all at the same place spiritually, but that's OK.  The journey has not ended, and we all still have miles to go.  But you know what the cool part is- both for those of us who gathered yesterday and hundreds of others who have shared that same bond over the many years?  We will always- ALWAYS- have friends on the journey that we know us- and love us anyway.  That is a gift from God that I will always be thankful for. Thanks, my friends, for the love and grace you showed me simply by wanting to be there yesterday.  We received all kinds of motes from former FUMC-K students who wanted to be there so badly.  And Kelly Jeck Trace, I'm so sorry you didn't get the word we were getting together- I guess giving up Facebook for Lent does have a downside!  I pray God's blessings for all of the former youth group family members out there.  If you missed yesterday, I hope to see you soon!

Because of Jesus,

Saturday Shout Outs!

It's been a few weeks since I did a Saturday Shout Out and there's been a lot going on, so let's get started!

• A special thanks to all of my friends (new and old) who participated in Comment Day on Thursday of this week.  I visited 57 blogs and left comments, and over 350 of you visited this blog.  Some of you left comments.  The rest of you owe me!  :)

• A couple of Saturdays back Marilyn and I had lunch with Stephanie Greife (Wesley Memorial) and just had a blast reconnecting.  Steph and I are going to try again sometime this week.  If anyone else from the old Graceland gang wants to join in the fun, just let me know!  I also heard from new Hall of Fame inductee Travis Aiken.  Plus the 2 of them, Lexi Woods and Alexandra Smith all commented on the great indoor rafting picture (at right) on Marilyn's Facebook.  It's great hearing from the Wesley crowd!
• This past Monday I had lunch with Connor Lewis (FUMC-K) and his lovely wife, Jolene.  They have 2 great kids and are still living in Atlanta, but were here on a whirlwind tour of Florida to visit family.  It was so great to see Connor and catch up.  Anytime I get to hang out with any of my old students I am reminded how blessed my life has been- and is! 

• OK, FUMC-K alumni, it's Trivia Time!  Where was the picture at right taken?  I'll give you bonus points for telling me what trip this was taken on.  Everyone with the right location gets an autographed picture of Jerry Hanbery!
• Speaking of Jerry, at noon today I'll be having lunch here in Tampa with Marilyn & Will, Jerry & Melissa Hanbery, Lisa Krause Spires, Jennifer Minnigan Kuramochi, Caitlin Esry, Bethany Esry, Julia Pribyl and anyone else from the old FUMC-K crowd who happens to show up!  The Green Iguana may never recover. I'll try to have some pictures for you tomorrow.
• Do any of you watch American Idol?  Can anyone explain Pia getting the boot this week?  I was so psyched to have a final six shoot out between Lauren, Pia, Haley, Scotty, James and Casey.  Now I don't know what will happen.  Will all the women be voted off first?  I hate to admit it, but the Jones family is totally hooked on AI...
• My Artifacts of Youth Ministry posts have drawn lots of visitors over the past few Saturdays, and I will return with a new (old?) artifact new weekend.  It's been fun digging for artifacts to use.
• Will is driving more and more with his learner's permit, and he is doing really well.  He can drive with anyone over 21 in the car.  Volunteers? :)
• Conner the Dog has apparently give up sleep for Lent- which means I did too.  5:17 AM today... 
• Speaking of Lent, have you been reading my 40 Day Adventure devotional blog?  If you haven't, be sure and check out yesterday's post.  The featured song, The Real Jesus, is one of the most amazing songs ever written.
• And finally...Thank you, Teresa Reep Tysinger (FUMC-K).  What an incredibly WONDERFUL idea.  I trained you well.  HA!!!

That's it for now.  As always, let me know if I can be praying for you and your families.  Thanks again for reading and making me feel so blessed.

Because of Jesus,

Soul Surfers and Roaring Lambs

A quick note:  I try not to mix my blogs, but if you are not familiar with the Downhere song The Real Jesus, then be sure and visit The 40 Day Adventure today and give it a listen,  Goosebumps every time!  Now on with our regularly scheduled post...




  Today the movie Soul Surfer opens in theaters.  It is the true story of surfing champion Bethany Hamilton, who lost an arm in a shark attack and still found the faith and the strength to come back to competitive surfing.  It has an outstanding cast (Helen Hunt, Dennis Quaid, Carrie Underwood, Anna-Sophia Robb) and a great story to tell, and I plan to see it soon.  I feel a very strong personal connection to this film.  Bethany is from the Hawaiian island of Kauai- the same island that is the home of my friend Rick Bundschuh and that produced my favorite little band, Spooky Tuesday.  In fact, both Bethany and I wrote blurb reviews for Rick's Deep Like Me that appear in the book.  And we follow each other on Twitter.  I've never met her, but I do feel a connection.

But that is only part of the reason I am so excited about this film. The late Bob Briner, author of the life-changing book Roaring Lambs, often talked about how Christians had abandoned our role of being "salt & light" in our world.  Bob thoughts were that the great culture shaping mediums of our day- books, music, movies, TV and art- were mediums the Church had handed over to "the world."  Oh, we still do all of those things- but we do them for ourselves.  We have figured out a way to be neither in nor of the world- and that is not what Jesus had in mind.  Non-believers rarely visit the Family Christian Bookstore or watch The 700 Club.  The unchurched are not likely to be found in a Left Behind screening or purchasing the latest Third Day CD.  These types of artistry are wonderful and have great value to us in our "Christian Ghetto," but they do little to actually impact the culture around us.  Bob was trying to convey to us all that while we are sheep following the great shepherd, if we want to be agents of change for Jesus we have to let our lives roar.  And that is exactly what is happening with this movie.  Bethany is not a preacher, she is a surfer.  But her faith will roar through this film.  This film is not about Christianity, is it about being faithful and searching for God in the midst of real tragedy and real struggle- and that is the kind of story that will resonate with people far outside the walls of the Church.  And like the Narnia movies and the Veggietale movies before it, hopefully Soul Surfer will encourage major studios to spend big bucks on movies that speak of faith and morality in a language the entire culture can understand.  We need to influence culture, not abandon it...

You want to know what a roaring lamb looks like in our world?  On Wednesday night's American Idol, a young man named Jacob Lusk was preparing to do Marvin Gaye's Let's Get It On for Rock 'N' Roll Hall of Fame night.  Jacob had shown his gospel roots in previous shows, and as he practiced several music business insiders told him it was awesome to see him step outside his comfort zone.  But Jacob felt uncomfortable with the sexual message of the song, and decided to change to a different tune- Michael Jackson's great song Man In the Mirror.  He explained all of this on camera.  He never mentioned God or Jesus, but he did speak very clearly abut being faithful to his beliefs.  He absolutely owned the song, and the crowd loved him.  Randy Jackson applauded him for standing up for his moral convictions.  At that moment, Jacob Lusk's life roared to to the 25 million people or so who watch Idol each week.  And he is still around for next week.

We may not have an audience of that size, but that is beside the point.  The question is simple: Do our lives roar in a way so that the people we encounter every day know that we are followers of Jesus?  Or are your spiritual thoughts and actions reserved for the friends  who already believe?  We cannot change the culture if we leave Jesus at church every Sunday.  Use moments like Soul Surfer or Jacob Lusk to start conversations that might just change the culture you spend most of your time in.  The world is not watching and waiting to see what we do.  The world no longer cares. It's time for us to make a difference in our culture.  It's time for the lambs to roar...

Because of Jesus,

A Gift For My Fellow Bloggers

So here's the deal about my blog.  I started this thinking no one would ever read it.  I began in the hope that I could blog every day for a year. Now, over 590 straight days of blogging later, I write for my own discipline, my own peace of mind, and to praise Jesus.  There are no ads here.  All I ask of you is to read- and make an occasional comment...

Today has been set aside (in my mind!) as Comment Day for my fellow bloggers!  Today, when you read a blog (and I hope you will read many) I want you to take the time and leave a comment for the writer.  You cannot imagine how special it is is to pour out your soul (or at least a few random thoughts) in a blog post and have someone respond to your words or add to your thoughts.  It is truly a blessing.

I love writing this blog, and it has given me more than I could have ever expected.  It has given me discipline, it has improved my prayer life, it has connected me with old friends I thought were lost and gone forever, and it has given me new friends that I count as blessings.  Many of you have left me comments since I began this adventure, and for that I am beyond grateful.  But today is not about me!  I am going to read at least 30 blogs today and comment on each of them, and I simply ask that you join me in affirming the writers that you love to read. 

If you need help finding blogs, there is a list on bottom right of this page, or you can click on my profile to see even more.  If you would like me to read your blog today, just send me a link at youthguy07@aol.com  or tweet a link to @youthguy07.  And if you would like to read a vintage post of mine just to stay sharp (lol) check out Boy Like Me, Man Like You from September 23, 2009.  It's one of my favorites. 

So go read.  Enjoy.  And comment.  Be a blessing to a blogger today!

Because of Jesus,

Ohana Means Family

It was early in my time (2002) at Wesley Memorial UMC that Walt Disney Animation released the movie Lilo & Stitch.  It quickly became one of my son Will's favorite movies, and once we got it on VHS we watched it a lot- A LOT!  It's a great movie with wonderful music (much of it from Elvis!) and a tremendous story with a great deal of heart.  But for me, the more I watched it, the more I saw our student ministry in it.  Let me explain.

In the film, Lilo is a little girl ( somewhat of a wild child) who has lost her mom and dad and is being raised by her older sister.  Despite this, she has a strong idea of what family is.  She is Hawaiian, and her word for family is Ohana.  As is said several times in the movie, "Ohana means family.  And family means no one gets left behind.  Or forgotten."  As I have mentioned here before, when I looked at our youth group family at WMUMC I saw a lot of kids from broken families, and a lot of students who felt like they had been left behind and forgotten.  There were families dealing with sickness and loss.  There were families where abuse was taking place.  There were Sunday afternoons when over half of our group came from families who had no connection to the church.  There were weeks when teenagers stayed at the church or my home (right next door) from the end of the last worship service (around noon) until Graceland started at 5 PM- because if they went home no one would bring them back.  There were times (and this is true for almost every youth pastor I have ever known) when I would pay for supper or a movie for a dozen youth, because there was no other way they could be part of an outing.  We used our youth ministry budget to keep costs low for trips and offer scholarships so everyone had opportunities to share in all of our "family" activities.   It was crucial for so many of these teens to be included in our Ohana, because their families had indeed left them behind.  We gave them opportunities they had never had before.  We were simply seeking to show them love in the name of Jesus, because in the end that is the Ohana that matters most- the family of God.

We were far from perfect.  There were times students felt left out and inadequate.  We had to deal with cliques, prejudices and all of the other things that make the teenage world such a caste system.  But the one thing we could always make sure of is that each and every one of them knew they were loved.  The old saying, "We may not be much, but we're all they've got" was often in my prayers.  In the movie, Stitch (an alien creature, for the uneducated) become part of Lilo's Ohana.  At one point he describes being part of that family like this:  "This is my family.  I found it, all on my own.  Is little, and broken, but still good.  Yeah, still good."   I have heard students describe our youth ministry family with that exact same sentiment.  We were often seen as odd by the rest of the church.  We didn't always manage to keep students in the family.  But our Youth Ministry Team always did their best to make sure that no one ever felt left behind or forgotten.  I had a WMUMC student recently tell me (and leave a comment here on the blog) that Graceland saved her life.  And that was what our Ohana was really all about.- offering hope, community and the life-saving love of Jesus to all who "found us."

However...as we see with our own federal government, where and on whom we spend our money can be a sensitive (and often nasty) issue.  And so it was at WMUMC.  That story next Monday.  Tomorrow, get ready to read and write- on other blogs.  It's Comment Day!

Because of Jesus,

Superstar

As I continue to read scripture and write my Lenten devotional blog The 40 Day Adventure in preparation for Easter, I am continually amazed at how quickly the people turned on Jesus during the final week of his earthly life.  It was such a short ride from the glory of the triumphal entry to the hatred of  "give us Barabbas!"  There were lots of reasons for this (not least of all God's plan), but the one that keeps coming back to me is "expectations."  The Jewish people in Jerusalem, the ones who had begun to follow Jesus and hope that he could possibly be the promised Messiah, were ready for the Nazarene to have his Braveheart moment.  They were ready to hear him shout "FREEDOM!"  I believe they really thought he was finally coming to town to kick butt and takes names.   And when they saw that he not there to lead the kind of revolution they were expecting, they quit on him and sold him out.

And they were not alone.  The Andrew Lloyd Webber/Tim Rice musical Jesus Christ, Superstar captures this feeling well.  Judas was expecting a revolution.  The Pharisees wanted Jesus to prove he was God.  Even the local leaders like Herod were just asking for some kind of sign so they could believe.  The following words are from the song Herod, a truly pivotal moment in the musical:

Jesus, I am overjoyed to meet you face to face
You've been getting quite a name all around the place
Healing cripples, raising from the dead
Now I understand you're God- at least that's what you've said


So you are the Christ
You're the great Jesus Christ
Prove to me that you're divine
Change my water into wine
That's all you need do
Then I'll know it's all true
C'mon King of the Jews


Jesus you just won't believe the hit you've made around here
You are all we talk about, You're the wonder of the year
Oh what a pity if it's all a lie
Still I'm sure you can rock the cynics if you try


So if you are the Christ
Yes the great Jesus Christ
Prove to me that you're no fool
Walk across my swimming pool
If you do that for me
Then I'll let you go free
C'mon King of the Jews


I only ask what I'd ask any superstar, What is it that you have got
That puts you where you are? Oh, ho ho
I am waiting, Yes I'm a captive fan
I'm dying to be shown that you are not just any man


So if you are the Christ
Yes the great Jesus Christ
Feed my household with this bread
You can do it on your head
Or has something gone wrong?
Jesus, why do you take so long?
Aw, c'mon King of the Jews

And then Herod sends him back to Pilate to be judged.  There would be no signs and wonders that would lead to a political revolution.  The Jesus Revolution would be something completely different- a revolution of the heart. 

Sometimes I think we haven't learned much in 2000+ years.  We are still waiting for Jesus to prove to us that he is the Son of God.  Far too many Christians are still waiting on a political revolution, one where the laws of the land will force people to believe Jesus is LORD.  Far too many of us approach "religion" with a "seeing is believing" kind of attitude, when in fact scripture is clear that "believing is seeing."  Far too many of us still go to Jesus in prayer with Herod's words: "If you are the Christ..."  We so often pray for healing, financial help, relationships and everything else not with power and conviction, but with a test phrase- "If you are the Christ..."  We have religion but no faith.  If there is to be a true Jesus Revolution in our day, then it will happen because we have not the faith of the religious leaders of Jesus' day, but the faith of the Roman Centurion.  Our prayers will begin with, "Because You are God, I know all things are possible!"  The revolution must take place in our hearts.  And we need to get on with it.  I don't claim to understand much about the second coming of Christ, but I do get this part- next time He will be kicking butt and taking names, and we will know without doubt that he is indeed a Superstar.  I am not waiting until I see him.  I am going to believe right now.  Are you ready to chose Jesus? 

Because of Jesus,