#SaveThanksgiving

Anyone who knows me well can tell you that I love Christmas. I love the music, the movies, the decorations, Santa, the traditions and the trees. I love that for many people it is still about the birth of the babe of Bethlehem and what that means in each of our lives. I even love shopping on Christmas Eve, one of my grand traditions! I love the Christmas season. But I have to tell you,  what "Christmas" has become in our USAmerican society is really starting to make me a little crazy. Christmas and I have a problem...it's killing Thanksgiving!

Maybe it is the faulty memory of an aging man, but it seems to me like Thanksgiving used to be an actual holiday, one we could enjoy and savor as families. But increasingly it is become the red-headed stepchild to Christmas.  Stores have their Christmas displays out before Halloween is over. The TV commercials have already started. A house in my neighborhood already has a frickin' wreath on the door! Thanksgiving used to be the kickoff to the Christmas season. Now it is just a blip on the radar as we scream full speed ahead towards December. It's Black Friday: The Prequel. And I think it's time to do something about it.

I suppose it would help if there were more cultural landmarks associated with the holiday. Eating, The Macy's Parade and football in Dallas and Detroit (plus some other random city from the "can't leave well enough alone" minds of the NFL) are the first things that come to most people's minds. There are few Thanksgiving movies (Planes, Trains & Automobiles is the only GREAT one, although my son Will recommends The Hoboken Chicken Emergency!), no one sings Thanksgiving carols, and even Hallmark doesn't really push the holiday. A couple of years ago I wrote down a few suggestions on how to change all of that (see The Holiday That Time Forgot) but I don't see it happening anytime soon. 

The bigger issue to me is that with all of the attention given to the "Holiday Season," Thanksgiving has lost its meaning.  People fight all the time to keep the "Christ" in Christmas. I am fighting to put the "thanks" back in Thanksgiving!  When the pilgrims and Native Americans sat down at that first feast, they weren't there to kill time before the Cowboys played the 4 o'clock game or Walmart opened with two big screen TVs on sale for 10,000 shoppers to fight over. They were there to give thanks to God for the simple reason that they were still alive! They could have starved, frozen, been killed by wild animals or killed each other- but they hadn't. They sat down to share in a bounty provided by God and to praise Him for all the many things they had to be thankful for in life. They gathered as family and friends to count their many blessings. It was from those beginnings that the Thanksgiving holiday was born. And it is by returning to those roots that we can #SaveThanksgiving.

Every day in November (through the 28th) I will be sharing something I am thankful for in the upper left-hand corner of this blog. You can see I have started today. I will also be tweeting my blessings using the hashtag #SaveThanksgiving. I am asking Marilyn to do the same on Facebook. And I am asking all of you to join us.  Share with the world through social media the things in your life that you need to thank our loving God for providing. Let's remind our friends of WHY we have a Thanksgiving holiday. And if you are not the hashtag type, then share with your family and friends around the dinner table or in the car on the way to school, work, dance lessons or wherever you may be headed.  The point is that we GIVE THANKS. 

So by all means, look forward to the turturkeykey (a shout out to all the HIMYM viewers) and the trimmings. Remember the Mayflower and the history of the day.  Make an elaborate styrofoam cornucopia for your table centerpiece. Boycott shopping on Thanksgiving Day and by all means take the day to be with your family and friends.  But all along the way, remember the reason for the season (stole that one from Christmas- HA!). "Count your many blessings- name them one by one. Count your many blessings see what God has done!" If we do that, my friends, we just might accomplish something heroic. We just might #SaveThanksgiving.

Because of Jesus,

Flashback Friday: Pops

Wheels

There are some moments that are frozen in time. You can close your eyes and picture a moment 30 years ago as clearly as if it happened yesterday. For me, one of those moments took place at Quaker Lake Camp after a closing campfire around 1980. Everyone was saying their goodbyes on the softball field, when I noticed a lone camper, standing out by the pitcher's mound, crying. I walked over to her and asked her what was wrong, only to discover she had just been dumped by her camp boyfriend of the week. I knew her name was Laura Wheeler, but I didn't really know her very well. That frozen moment, however, was the beginning of one of the great friendships of my life.

We talked a long time that night, and in the months that followed wrote on occasion. By the following summer I couldn't wait until she came to camp. She and her cabin mates- Kristen Haworth, Jane Terrell, Jane Tesh, Debbie Tully, Angie Swaim, Mollie (Zowie! It's Mowwie!) Edwards and later, Sharron Tutterow, became "my girls." Kristen and Laura started calling me Pops ( I was all of 21!) and it stuck. That whole group eventually called me Pops, and we not only hung out at camp, but got together for dinner in the off-season and even had a Christmas party together. For the first time (but not the last) I became too attached to youth I worked with. When Debbie had surgery, I was there. When Laura became very sick, her parents called me and and I spent time with her at the hospital. I watched her suffer, struggle and recover, and we became incredibly close. These were not students in my youth ministry, but they meant the world to me. We shared great times and great sorrows, and I learned what it means to really be in ministry with a group of kids. It takes everything, just like Jesus said it would. I was no hero and I made plenty of missteps along the way, but I gave them everything I had, and they did the same. They gave me a Pops sweatshirt that I loved dearly. When it looked like we would not have any more time at QLC together, I wrote a song for them. We actually had a another year together, but the song remained meaningful for them and lots of other campers. I called it Leaving...But Not Really:

We’ve all come so far so fast,
becoming such close friends
And now that our time together has passed
Is this where it all has to end
Friends we go on living
So friends let’s go on loving
We may all think our time’s at end
But this is where we begin
To be friends

We’ll soon be many miles apart
With other people we need
But just because we’ll be apart
Let’s don’t give up what we’ve received
You don’t love friends with your eyes
It’s really your heart that cries
Love is friendship caught on fire
And love is what we require
From our friends

Friends, I will remember you
Think of you, pray for you
And when another day is through
I’ll still be friends with you.

The Family

And while I haven't seen them in many years, they are often on my mind and in my prayers. I hope that they have beautiful families and people in their lives who can love them the way they loved me. I write a lot about relationships and student ministry on this blog, and so much of what is near and dear to my heart I learned from these girls who cared so much about me.  Quaker Lake was never about the camp. It was always about the people. And for this "Pops," those people were some of the best.


A side note...Debbie called me one day when she was a senior in high school and told me that she had used the lyrics to the above song for a creative writing project.  She apologized and hoped I wasn't angry about it.  I just wanted to know her grade.  We got an "A!"


Because of Jesus,

Taking the Road Less Traveled

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood, and sorry I could not travel both

And be one traveler, long I stood and looked down one as far as I could

To where it bent in the undergrowth.  - Robert Frost

Sometimes I wonder.  I wonder what my life might have been like if God had not called me to youth ministry at the age of 18.  I might have taken a standard 9-5 office job and had a much more stable existence.  I almost certainly would have made more money.  I might have been able to maintain better relationships with my friends my own age, who often had a hard time understanding why my life revolved around teenagers.  I would have had to deal with less midnight phone calls, less traumatic family situations and less pressure to appear to live a sinless life- which, as I should have known, is not possible.  I most certainly would have spent less time on the road, sleeping in strange places and trying to keep students out of mischief.  I often think of the Robert Frost poem The Road Not Taken and realize how little I could see as I looked down the paths of life at the time when I chose to follow my calling.  I was so young and I knew so little.  I know my life would have been very different.  There is no question about that.  The real question is this- would my life have been better?  Sometimes I wonder...

Me and Alex, 2005.  And Stephanie's back, too!

And then I have a day like Wednesday.  I met two former students for lunch here in Tampa.  One of them, Stephanie Greife, I have had several lunches with over the past few months.  The other was Alexandra Smith, who I had not seen in over 5 years.  The two of them had once been very good friends, but had also drifted apart and not seen each other in several years.  Given the years apart and what had transpired in my life during that period, I had no idea what to expect.  It could have been quite awkward.  We met at Moe's at 11:15 AM, and it took about 30 seconds for me to realize there had been no reason to worry.  We began to talk like old friends- actually more like family, because indeed that is what we had been in our youth group days at Wesley Memorial UMC.  Alex was supposed to leave around 1 PM, but she cancelled her appointment.  We talked about struggles, relationships and what had happened in each of our lives since last we had been together.  We told old stories.  We laughed hysterically.  Each of these young women talked about how the memories we share together are among the most important times of their lives, a beacon of hope when things seem darkest.  And at the end of our time together- some 4 hours after we began- we made plans to do it again next week, hopefully with a few more lost members of our family.  My soul was lifted, and I was blessed by their love.  Alex showed me, as so many former students (including Steph) had before her, the true meaning of grace and forgiveness.  And they both reminded me that while my life's work had not been normal, it was significant.  

As I lay in bed that night, my mind racing with so many memories and so many stories, I thought again of The Road Not Taken - and I laughed out loud.  Following Jesus will always take us down a path that others will not understand.  My life's work in youth ministry  brought me (and my family) more love, joy and satisfaction than I could ever begin to explain. There are literally hundreds of former students all over this country who I am blessed to know and love as my extended family.  And we are all connected in the name of Jesus.  If I gave up some money, stability and normalcy to pursue this less traveled path, I was blessed with far more in return.  So to finish Robert Frost's thought:

Two roads diverged in a wood and I- I took the one less traveled by

And that has made all the difference.

I am no longer a youth pastor.  But the road less traveled continues on, and I cannot wait to see where it will lead me next.  I just know that I have an amazing extended family to travel with me.  And if you happen to be in the neighborhood of Lee Garden's Chinese Restaurant in Tampa for lunch this Tuesday, come on in.  It's been true with every group I ever worked with and it's still true today- everyone's welcome!  That's the way God's family works...

Because of Jesus,

True Family

Nina, Justin, Cory & Zach at Portillos

At the conclusion of our 2004 mission trip we had scheduled in a day of sight-seeing and fun in Chicagoland before starting our trip back to Tampa.  I had several purposes in mind when I did this.  First, I wanted the youth to see a little of downtown Chicago. Secondly, one of our adults, Ross Hurt, was tacking a family vacation on to our trip.  His parents lived in Illinois and his wife (Kena, part of our Youth Ministry Team) and daughter were flying up to meet him.  In addition, Ed and Robin Smith (more of our YMT) and their twin girls were also in the area visiting Ed's famous sister.  So we would head downtown for the day, then drive out to my former stomping grounds in the western suburbs and spend the night in a motel.  One with actual beds...

Dinner Time!

We took a train downtown to Union Station and walked around a bit until we arrived at the Sears Tower.  We did the tourist thing and went to the top, soaking up the observation deck and the history of that amazing city.  Afterwards we all ate stuffed pizza for lunch at Giordano's.  Some of the girls knew of an H & M store on Michigan Ave, and so we began to search for it.  It turned into a death march.  We walked MILES before finding that silly store- but we did find it.  Then we headed back to the CSM site, picked up our van, and headed out to the suburbs for a night of relaxation before our long drive back to Tampa.

Ohana Means Family

We checked into our motel in Lombard, IL and immediately hit the pool.  We had a great time cooling off, harassing each other and just generally having fun together.  Then we headed across the highway to the Yorktown Mall (former home of the Veggietales studio) and a Chicago institution called Portillos.  Famous for Chicago-style hot dogs and Italian beef, it was an old favorite of mine.  It was also where we met up with the Hurts and the Smiths.  We had an amazing meal and a great time of fellowship.  It occurred to me as we were sitting there that this was what the family of God was all about.  We had adults, youth and babies sharing a meal together.  All of us had worked together in the name of Jesus.  We had given praise to Him and given ourselves to Him in worship.  We had played, prayed and broken bread together.  And the best part was we had done it all TOGETHER.  We were living Acts 2:42.  I can look at this group photo taken outside of the restaurant and KNOW that we loved each other in God's name- and that is amazing love indeed.

Ross and Bree

We almost ruined the whole thing by going to see the newly released Spiderman 2 that night- I fell asleep- but we eventually made it home.  I still have an orange t-shirt from the trip that was "customized" for me by Lexi and Christine (with messages of love) using paint from the synagogue work site.  Each time I wear it I am reminded of the best mission trip I ever led.  It may not be my favorite trip- but it was the best.


Because of Jesus,

Ohana Means Family

It was early in my time (2002) at Wesley Memorial UMC that Walt Disney Animation released the movie Lilo & Stitch.  It quickly became one of my son Will's favorite movies, and once we got it on VHS we watched it a lot- A LOT!  It's a great movie with wonderful music (much of it from Elvis!) and a tremendous story with a great deal of heart.  But for me, the more I watched it, the more I saw our student ministry in it.  Let me explain.

In the film, Lilo is a little girl ( somewhat of a wild child) who has lost her mom and dad and is being raised by her older sister.  Despite this, she has a strong idea of what family is.  She is Hawaiian, and her word for family is Ohana.  As is said several times in the movie, "Ohana means family.  And family means no one gets left behind.  Or forgotten."  As I have mentioned here before, when I looked at our youth group family at WMUMC I saw a lot of kids from broken families, and a lot of students who felt like they had been left behind and forgotten.  There were families dealing with sickness and loss.  There were families where abuse was taking place.  There were Sunday afternoons when over half of our group came from families who had no connection to the church.  There were weeks when teenagers stayed at the church or my home (right next door) from the end of the last worship service (around noon) until Graceland started at 5 PM- because if they went home no one would bring them back.  There were times (and this is true for almost every youth pastor I have ever known) when I would pay for supper or a movie for a dozen youth, because there was no other way they could be part of an outing.  We used our youth ministry budget to keep costs low for trips and offer scholarships so everyone had opportunities to share in all of our "family" activities.   It was crucial for so many of these teens to be included in our Ohana, because their families had indeed left them behind.  We gave them opportunities they had never had before.  We were simply seeking to show them love in the name of Jesus, because in the end that is the Ohana that matters most- the family of God.

We were far from perfect.  There were times students felt left out and inadequate.  We had to deal with cliques, prejudices and all of the other things that make the teenage world such a caste system.  But the one thing we could always make sure of is that each and every one of them knew they were loved.  The old saying, "We may not be much, but we're all they've got" was often in my prayers.  In the movie, Stitch (an alien creature, for the uneducated) become part of Lilo's Ohana.  At one point he describes being part of that family like this:  "This is my family.  I found it, all on my own.  Is little, and broken, but still good.  Yeah, still good."   I have heard students describe our youth ministry family with that exact same sentiment.  We were often seen as odd by the rest of the church.  We didn't always manage to keep students in the family.  But our Youth Ministry Team always did their best to make sure that no one ever felt left behind or forgotten.  I had a WMUMC student recently tell me (and leave a comment here on the blog) that Graceland saved her life.  And that was what our Ohana was really all about.- offering hope, community and the life-saving love of Jesus to all who "found us."

However...as we see with our own federal government, where and on whom we spend our money can be a sensitive (and often nasty) issue.  And so it was at WMUMC.  That story next Monday.  Tomorrow, get ready to read and write- on other blogs.  It's Comment Day!

Because of Jesus,

CCM Thursday: Hands & Feet

I loved Audio Adrenaline.  Over the years I must have seen them live at least a dozen times, and I own all of their CD's, including both greatest hits packages.  I first fell in love with them at a National Youth Workers Convention in Nashville in the mid-90's.  Lead singer Mark Stuart had a really bad cold, and by the time they reached their final song, Big House, he could no longer sing.  So one of their roadies sang the lead vocal.  How could you help but love them?

One of my very favorite Audio A songs is Hands And Feet off the Underdog album.  It is one of the very best mission-oriented songs ever written.  The chorus is a prayer for God to use each of us to accomplish His work on our planet.  Today I share their music video for the song, and I hope it will inspire you as it does me, and as it did many students I worked with over the years.  And while we are on the subject of giving and serving, check out the Compassion International information located in the right hand column of this page.  Find a way to share Jesus today with those who need Him.  Enjoy the song.

"If the Phone Doesn't Ring, It's Me"



Part of the Wesley Memorial "family"

I often speak about how the student ministries I served became family over the years, and this is true in every sense of the word.  There are "kids" I have not seen in nearly 20 years who still call on me for prayer, support and advice.  There were people I had not connected with in 30 years, but because of this blog (which has become a place for my various youth groups to come together in one giant family reunion) I know they have fond memories and strong connections to the things we went through together.  When done well, youth groups become families in God's name, and I treasure all of those relationships.

But I need to acknowledge before God and my readers that like with any family, there are struggles.  I was never perfect; I didn't become a sinner because I sinned.  I sinned because, like everyone else, I am a sinner.  There are people out there- former youth and their parents- who because of my public sin would like to forget they were ever a part of my family.  Because of my failings, it has become painful for them to think about our time together.  Even reading this blog and reliving the wonderful times we shared would be difficult.  I understand this and apologize for it.  I hope they will forgive me at some point- partly selfishly, and partly because I hope I taught them that forgiveness is the business of Christians.  Their feelings do not negate the fact that we shared life together with Jesus and we were important to one another.  That is why I continue to share these stories.  But I know that some of their memories of our time together are tainted.  It's kind of like if I wear a blue shirt everyday, and your knowledge of me is that I am a blue shirt guy.  A good guy.  Suddenly, without warning, I show up in a red shirt- a sin stained shirt- and you're stunned and disappointed.  As time goes by, you might forget about all the good days in the blue shirts and focus on the red one. This has happened with some people I love dearly.  They can no longer picture me in a blue shirt.  It's like I wore red the whole time.  With God, because of grace, the red shirt is gone forever.  With people...hopefully time will heal the wounds that I inflicted.

As a result of those feelings that I know exist in my youth ministry family, there are people I have not tried to contact in a very long time.  There are people I miss terribly, but I am waiting on God to give them open hearts and myself the opportunity to reach out to them.  I certainly do not wish to cause them any more pain, so I will continue to wait on them to take the first step.  In the meantime, I miss them and love them.  I yearn to send them an e-mail or give them a call.  But I can't- not yet.  The great poet laureate of Florida, Jimmy Buffet, wrote a song years ago that expresses a great deal of my emotion.  The lyrics are below.  We can't live in the past, but hopefully we can live through it.  If the phone doesn't ring, it's me.  To everyone who was a part of my youth family over the many years- I love you all, and more importantly, so does Jesus.  A the old cliche says, "I don't know what the future holds, but I know who holds the future."  Jesus does.  And because of that, we will have a family reunion- some day.  Spread the word.

There are oceans of feelings between us

Currents that take us and sweep us away

That's why we seldom have seen us

In the light of the cold, hard day

Lots of new friends with the same old problems

Open your eyes you might see

If our lives were that simple we'd live in the past

If the phone doesn't ring, it's me

If the phone doesn't ring you'll know that it's me

I'll be out in the eye of the storm

If the phone doesn't ring you  know that I'll be

Where someone can make me feel warm

It's too bad we can't turn and live in the past

If the phone doesn't ring, it's me

I've had good days and bad days and goin' half mad days

I've tried to let go but you're still on my mind

I've lost all the old ways, been searching for new ways

and putting it all on the line

Lots of new friends with the same old answers

Open your eyes you might see

If our lives were that simple we'd live in the past

If the phone doesn't ring, it's me

If it takes all the future, we'll live through the past

If the phone doesn't ring, it's me...

Because of Jesus,

A Tale of One City- and Two Friends!

Marilyn and Will made it safely to the great white North Carolina, so I am home alone this week.  I feel like pulling a Kevin McAlister:  "I'm eating junk food and watching rubbish (football) so you better come out and stop me..."

I have these 2 friends.  They have never met, but I suspect they will soon.  This is a little bit their story and a little bit my story.  But mostly, it's God's story...

There was a young woman who was an important part of my student ministry at Springfield Friends Meeting in High Point, NC back in the late early 90's.  She came from an often distressed family situation, and she had some health issues.  She also had a tremendous love for Jesus.  After I left SFM, she continued to grow in her faith, and she eventually became a youth pastor herself.  She married a wonderful guy whose job moves him around a bit, and so she served churches in various parts of the country.  In November of 2010 they moved to Las Vegas, and she prepared to start over again.  And one of her priorities was finding a new church home.

There was a man who was called to ministry at Wesley Memorial UMC in Tampa about 8 months after I arrived there in 2001.  He and his lovely wife came from Charlotte,NC, and he was WMUMC's first full-time contemporary worship leader. He did it with flair, passion and a heart for God.  He was later called to move to a new ministry in 2005, shortly before I left WMUMC.  In this new ministry he was much freer to lead worship in the manner of his choosing, and he has thrived there.  I watch videos of their worship on a regular basis, and the church is on fire for Jesus.  As you may have guessed, the church is in Las Vegas.

Yesterday, at my suggestion, Ashley attended worship at The Crossing.  She wrote to me Sunday afternoon and said she had loved every minute of it.  She was warmly greeted, she felt comfortable and she LOVED the worship.  She immediately saw the passion in my old friend Jason, and she was moved by the service.  She told me that for the first time since her arrival in Vegas, she felt that she was home.  I immediately wrote Jason to let him know that the presence of the LORD has been felt in that house of worship on December 26th.

Why is this rather random set of occurrences special to me?  Because I don't believe it is random at all.  God puts people in our lives for a reason.  Every person we connect with, every life we impact, every soul we touch matters to God.  And He uses those connections to help mold our lives as we seek to serve Him in the name of Jesus.  My simple Twitter message to Ashley could be the start of something big.  Or it may have just led to one day of praising Jesus.  Either way, I feel that God used my life to make a difference.  As we head down the stretch to the beginning of a new year, I encourage you to be open to letting God use you in ways big and small to make a difference.  I talk all the time about "finding my ministry" in this new, post-youth ministry life I lead.  Yesterday, at least for one day, I found exactly what God needed me to do.  It's not just a song.  He really is an AWESOME GOD!

Because of Jesus,

A Moment With Mullins

Some of you are aware of my history with the sacrament of communion.  I have shared how growing up in the Society of Friends (Quakers) gave me a unique perspective on the importance of remembering the sacrifice of Christ as part of daily life, not just as a symbolic ritual (to read more, see Communion Confusion).  In that same post I told the story of serving communion at New Garden Friends Meeting- something that had never been done before.  I shared the story of serving communion to the youth of Springfield Friends Meeting at a beach retreat, using Krispy Kreme doughnuts and orange juice.  I compared lunch at Pizza Inn to communion.  I have led and served Holy Communion at Methodist churches.  I have experienced tremendous power in the taking of the communion elements; I have also gone through the motions on many occasions.  In high school I attended Easter Mass at Myrtle Beach with my friend Steve Furr and witnessed the sharing of the Eucharist with 2000 Catholics.  And on Easter Sunday 2007 I served the Lord's Supper using stale rolls and frozen apple juice in a place where all present were struggling to keep from losing all hope- including myself.  It is safe to say that I think about practicing the presence of Christ- and that is what communion truly is- each and every day.

The late Rich Mullins and I shared this unique perspective, because he too grew up among Quakers.  Like myself, Rich loved the sacrament, and found great power in the symbolism of the bread and the juice.  But also like me, Rich understood that symbolism is not necessary in order to commune with God.  Every meal, every moment of solitude, every moment of praise can be spent in communion.  Remembering Jesus should not require the bread and the cup; it should be an everyday experience.   Our lives should be lived "in remembrance" of Jesus and the sacrifice He made for us.  And yet the the symbolism of the sacrament should not be lost on us.  It is an invitation to the family of God to sit together at the feet of the Savior.  Rich wrote today's featured song to express those beliefs.  He wanted the world to know that the "Peace of Christ" is always available, and that we are all invited to join the feast.  No matter the setting, no matter the moment, the love of Christ is available to us.  And we are to share that love.  In Rich's words,

Though we're strangers, still I love you

I love you more than your mask

And you know you have to trust this to be true

And I know that's much to ask

But lay down your fears, come and join this feast

He has called us here, you and me

So take this moment to hear the beauty of Peace (A Communion Blessing) and come into the presence of the Christ.  Experience His love.  Accept His invitation and come join the feast, wherever you may be.  "Peace of Christ to you..."

Footprints On Our Hearts

The closer we came to leaving Kissimmee in 2000, the harder it became to let go of the people there that we loved so much.  During those last few weeks my office at the church was a beehive of activity.  Students, parents, church staff and Youth Ministry Team members seemed to be in and out all the time.  None of us wanted to say good-bye.  In an effort almost no one knew about, I went back into the office of The Pastor Who Shall Not Be Named and offered to call Union Church and tell them I was staying at FUMC-K.  All he had to do was say the word.  He did not.  As we began packing in earnest youth stopped by the house to help, to watch and to eat our food.  Amber Herrick stopped by to yell at me for leaving- as did others.  People I had not seen it a while showed up for events.  It made leaving just that much more difficult.

Then the farewell parties began.  When you have spent six years building what are hopefully deep and lasting relationships with people, bidding them adieu is no fun.  But everyone feels a need for closure in such situations, so there were a variety of events put together so that we could all say good-bye to one another.  I don't remember many details about the actual events.  I do remember that the final farewell was a reception after church in the Fellowship Hall, and that it was very nice (I also remember that The Pastor Who Shall Not Be Named couldn't be bothered to stay more than 5 minutes).  What I really remember from all of the events is that we got 4 amazing gifts that I still treasure. 

• The choir that Marilyn and I sang with, Joyful Praise, gave us a framed copy of one of my favorite anthems we had done- We've Come This Far By Faith.  It was signed by all of the choir members, and it hangs on the wall in our living room today.  Andrew Lewis was someone we were going to miss tremendously.
• Some of the younger girls in the group- Bethany Esry, Brittney Herder, Isabelle Davis, Julia Pribyl and I am not sure who else- made a scrap book for us.  You have seen some of those pictures on this blog, and that scrapbook is very dear to me.  So is the inscription inside the front cover:  "To Carl Jones, the BEST youth leader ever!"  They were wrong, of course, but I love them for saying it!
• Sam and Leila Lupfer presented me with a journal with the title, "Carl, I'll Never Forget the Time..."  In it, many members of the Youth Ministry Team and church staff had remembered events and moments that we had shared over the years.  Entries from the Lupfer's, Cindy Martin, Cathy Thacker, Mark & Beth McKenna, Dana Schmidt, Karen Fry, Michael & Becky McCleery, Brian and Jill Watson, Carol Kraus, Sandi Lynch and more were so meaningful and touching. 
• The youth, led by filmmaker Colleen Martin, produced a video to say good-bye.  It was awesome.  Most of it was shot in my office; every time I watch it I am reminded how AMAZING that office was!  Among the the video highlights were Sara Autrey telling me how "degraditated" (her favorite made-up word) she was that I was leaving;  Colleen trying to interview Nate Kern in the men's room, where he was pretending to pee;  Adam Hill marking me off his list of People to Kill while applying lipstick;  "Twins" Melissa Lynes and Erica Souther telling me how much I would miss them;  Kelly Jeck singing the Oscar Mayer bologna song (spelling it wrong, of course);  Matt & Dana Schmidt talking with their backs to the camera because they "refused to watch me leave;"  Andrew Rogers not appearing on film, but providing the voice for a doll and singing Figaro; Sarah Whitman asking me to say hello to all the truckers for her; Jena Threadgill pretending to come out of the shower to be interviewed; and Josh Fry telling me how much he would miss me as he peeled off 5 layers of shirts and coats and then poured water all over his t-shirt.  There were also segments from Erik Jacobsen, Lindsey Joiner, Sarah Crudele, Melanie Schultz and Karen Fry that still bring me to tears.  I cannot express how much I treasure that video.

In Dr. Jill's (pictured) entry in the journal I was given she wrote, "I am thankful that you have always loved me just because...and in spite of...who I am."  Today, I could use those same words to express my love to her and the many others from those days who have loved me when I certainly didn't deserve it.  That same journal contained an inscription from the publisher on the inside cover.  The words were meant for me at the time, but they apply so well to what all of us- youth and adults- shared in those days at FUMC-K.  I'll close with them:

Some people come into our lives and quickly go.  Some people move our souls to dance.  They awaken us to new understanding with the passing whisper of their wisdom, and make the sky more beautiful to gaze upon.  Some people stay in our lives a while, leave footprints on our hearts, and we are never, ever the same.

Because of Jesus,

We Are the Family of God

"We are the family of God, yes

We are the family of God, and

He's brought us together to be one in Him

that we might bring light to the world."

During my last few years serving Springfield Friends Meeting we began having what we called "Alumni Gatherings."  At those times when former youth group members were home from college, we would plan a lunch at Pizza Inn or some other small event to help us all stay in touch.  Every year at the YFYF Christmas Party at our house the alumni were not only invited, but invited to stay for a couple of hours after everyone else went home.  By Christmas of 1993 we had quite a large group that stayed in touch, but were missing the special times we had shared over the years on youth trips.  So we decided to plan an Alumni Trip for the week after Christmas, 1994, to the one place we knew we could get people excited about.  We were going back to Walt Disney World.

Much of the planning for this event took place in a booth at Pizza Inn, with Todd Farlow and Danny McCorquodale supplying most of the brain power.  Unknown to them at the time, I was thinking of leaving SFM for a youth ministry position in Kissimmee- but that would not effect the trip much at all.  We booked rooms at Disney's All Star Resort and began to advertise the event to our old friends.  To be honest, many of the details of the trip are gone from my memory, because during the following months we did move to Florida.  Life got very hectic.  But the trip went ahead as planned, and in December around 15 former youth descended on Orlando by car and plane.  And we had an awesome week together.  I will never forget the night at The Fireworks Factory when we told them all the news that Marilyn was pregnant with Will.  That group of people meant so much to us.

I wrote yesterday of relationships and ministry.  Thinking back, this group defines what relationships are like in the real world.  There were a number of couples who made the trip, and almost none of them are stayed together.  There were guys on the trip who were the best of friends but seldom see each other anymore even though they live less than 30 minutes apart.  There are people who have moved away from High Point- some very far away.  Some are very involved with SFM; others have new church families; others have drifted away from God.  This group is a sampling of what happens to every church youth group as students grow into adults.  But here's the thing- for that group, and for many others I have been associated with over the years, the relationships we built in their younger days are still there, and still significant. If we were to find ourselves thrown back together again, there would not be awkwardness, there would be love and joy.  When Ken Hill called a few months back to say he would be at WDW for a conference, we couldn't wait to see him.  If Charles Freedle or Michael Mercadante needed to share a room with Marilyn and I (as they did that week) they would be welcomed.  The same is true for anyone from any of the groups I have been blessed to be a part of.  The relationships formed in youth group bring you in to the Family of God, and the grace of Jesus keeps you there.  The bonds are strong, and the threads of love run deep.  Even when you don't realize they are there...

The picture you see at the top was taken on the Alumni Trip at Splash Mountain.  The gang had it framed and gave it to us, and it sits on display in our living room.  It contains couples no longer together and friends who have drifted apart.  But to me it is a symbol of all of the love and laughter that has passed through my life over so many years of being blessed to work with amazing people in God's name.  It is a picture of the joy that comes from being part of the Family of God.  This blog has allowed me to reconnect with many of you who are, in my heart, a part of that picture.  God's family portrait is one amazing photograph, and I am thrilled to be in it with all of you.  And one day there will be a family reunion that will be the absolute best party ever!  See you there...

Because of Jesus,