That New Thing

In October of 1987 the youth ministry of Springfield Friends Meeting began our new outreach program,which we called TNT.  What TNT stood for was a little up for grabs!  Sometimes it meant "That New Thing."  Sometimes it meant "The Next Thing."  For the most part, we just stuck with TNT!  We had spent a month advertising and talking about it, building interest and enthusiasm throughout the community.  Some of the Trinity High School cheerleaders, friends of our own Robin Simmons, were coming to be part of a pie eating contest (see picture- that's Todd Farlow!).  Not much else about that first Monday night stands out in my memory.  There are a few things I am certain of.  I am certain that we sang, and that one of the songs was the old Olivia Newton John classic Let Me Be There.  The song became a theme song of sorts for us, and was also the last song I ever played and sang with the youth of Springfield at our farewell party in 1994.  I am certain there was a melodrama, and that it almost certainly included a character named Pup (which, spelled backwards, is Pup!).  I am certain we played several games, including our own version of the MTV classic Remote Control.  And I am absolutely certain it was the start of something wonderful.

That first TNT did not attract huge numbers.  That came later.  Eventually we would pull in non-Springfield students from Trinity, Southern Guilford, Ragsdale and High Point Central High Schools, as well as from the middle schools that fed them.  Students and leaders from Archdale Friends Meeting and High Point Friends Meeting became regulars at our Monday night event.  There would be times when we would draw as many as 80 youth to TNT.  In later years we would drive 30 minutes to Greensboro to take kids home after the program.  TNT did the three things we wanted it to do almost immediately.  It connected us to lots of new students in our community and helped us to connect them with Jesus.  It put Springfield on the map as "the place to be" for student ministry.  And it gave our students an outreach ministry.  TNT would have never succeeded if our youth had not invited their friends.  Amy Simmons, Todd Farlow, Jennifer Wood, Laurie Rees, Heather Beggs, Jill Gilbreth, Mike Mercadante and many others were much more responsible for our success over the years than I was.  And we had a great time doing it!

I often think about those days at Springfield and all of the wonderful people I came to know and love.  It always strikes me that so many of the youth who were a part of my life I would have never even known were it not for TNT.  You will read more about some of the people and special nights as this blog rolls along, but for today just understand this:  TNT was used by God to change all of Springfield Friends Meeting, not just the youth department.  We were faithful, and God blessed us.  Tomorrow you can read about how it put us in a national spotlight and headed us on to serving God in new and better ways!

Because of Jesus,

Flashback: Young Life

As the 1987-88 school year began my focus turned to starting a new youth ministry that would reach out into our community and bring in more students.  Springfield Friends Meeting was a decent size for a Quaker church, with average worship attendance around 125 at the time.   Studies have shown that youth group attendance is healthy if it is 10% of church attendance.  By that standard we were already thriving.  But I truly believed God was calling us to something greater.  The planning for what would become TNT was underway, and for me there was only one model to turn to.  Young Life.  So before we move on to the beginnings of TNT, allow me to flashback to my own high school days and tell you a little about Young Life (a worldwide organization that is still thriving today).

Young Life was already very active at Western Guilford High School when I arrived there in 1973.  Those were still the days when if you could get the cheerleaders and athletes involved in something, most of the school would follow.  Under the leadership of Fil Anderson (and later Steve Kimmel) Young Life had become a very "in" place to be.  Fil and the other leaders would hang out at the school around lunch time and at big games and events and build relationships with students.  These students would then bring their friends and come to what was known as Club meeting on a weeknight at a local church.  This worked well because Club was a riot!  There were skits, stunts, games and a short message about Jesus aimed at students who were not already Christians.  The music was always a highlight for me.  In addition to camp-style religious songs, we sang great oldies like Bye-Bye Love and Proud Mary.  It was light, it was fun, and it was addictive.  Once you attended Club, you were usually hooked.  Afterwards, we would all head to Burger King or Baskin-Robbins and hang out.  It was something to look forward to during the school week.

Young Life was more than just Club.  If you wanted to go deeper and work on your faith, then you could join a Campaigner Group.  I joined a group of guys who were good friends of mine, and we met every Monday morning at 6 AM at Tex and Shirley's Pancake House for food and Bible study.  This group was a great support for me and showed me a different side of Christianity than the one I saw at New Garden Friends Meeting, a much more evangelical side.  I loved both!  Looking back, it is interesting that 4 or 5 of the guys in that small group went on to full-time ministry of some sort.  I also attended a couple of YL retreats at Windy Gap, near Asheville, and each time came away having had significant spiritual growth moments.  In later years I played guitar for a number of YL events.  It was an important time in my life.

Young Life did not have a presence in the two primary high schools that Springfield students attended, or a large presence in any of the other three.  The model that had been such an influence on me seemed like the perfect way to begin our outreach to youth in the High Point/Archdale community.  In some ways we would be working backwards.  Our youth ministry was already in place as a kind of Campaigner Group.  What we needed was CLUB!  The final preparations for the first TNT in October of 1987 were underway.  Pies would be eaten (and thrown!).  Songs would be sung.  Spontaneous Melodramas would be acted out.  God had given me the vision.  Young Life had given us the model.  It was time...

Because of Jesus,

7 Things (100th Post Edition)

I made my 100th post to this blog a couple of days ago in my "pursuit of a dream" (remember that wall, Springfielders?) to blog about my life, my faith and my years in youth ministry for 365 consecutive days.  I have enjoyed the writing, even on the days when it has been a challenge.  I have loved hearing from old friends and former students through comments, the guestbook, e-mails and Marilyn's Facebook page.  I have enjoyed putting into print many of the stories I have been telling for years.  Most importantly, I have enjoyed expressing how God has blessed even a sinner like me for over 50 years!  Today I wanted to give you a chance to catch up a bit.  Below are links to 7 of my favorite older posts.  I hope you enjoy them as much as I do!

• So Here's The Deal   The first posting explains it all
• Six On Six      The story of the near "gang fight" in Atlanta, 1982
• Old Friends    Growing up with some of the best friends anyone ever had
• Sand, Water, Sand Water...   A Myrtle Beach tradition begins
• Shine On!     Let your life reflect Jesus to others
• Quaker Lake Jacket    Working at QLC changed my life
• Sunday Dinner     My introduction to Springfield and the Rees family

So go ahead, read all you want!  There is plenty more to come.  And remember, this blog exists to give glory to God for the blessings He has given me.  I hope that always shines through, even in the silliness!  May each of you have a blessed week.

Because of Jesus,

Farewell, David Tebbs!

Let me begin by saying it seemed like a good idea at the time.  Simple, innocent and funny is what we were going for.  In retrospect, it was doomed to the disaster it almost was from the very beginning. Our foolishness did, however, save Tim Vestal from some trouble- but you'll need to ask him abut that!  This story is true, although my memory may be faulty.  Please comment with your additions and corrections!

David Tebbs, the Youth and Christian Education Director of North Carolina Yearly Meeting in the mid 1980's was leaving that position at the end of the 1987 FUM Triennial Sessions.  After a rocky start, David was someone I had come to like and respect a great deal.  He was a strong Christian and someone who had brought great spiritual depth to the youth programs of NCYM.   David was also someone we loved to harass.  His shy, conservative demeanor and his appearance reminded us of the great Pat Boone (without the white shoes!), and he embarrassed and blushed quite easily.  It seemed that we needed to give him a proper farewell at the end of Triennials, and if we could see that famous blush, so much the better!

The "we" in this case consisted of Tom Klaus from Iowa Yearly Meeting and Brent Bill from Western Yearly Meeting- and myself.  Both Tom and Brent held the same position as David in their respective Yearly Meetings, and both were published writers who held a level of respect among the Quakers gathered in Greensboro that week.  I was just hanging out with them because I had known them for a while and because we had too much fun when we were together.  The three of us brainstormed what we could do to "get" David, and somehow, at someones suggestion, decided to bring a belly dancer into one of the final sessions of the event.  My memory is that Tom made the call (and since I know Brent reads this on occasion, I will place the blame on Tom) and ordered the dancer.  He explained that this was for a pastor, in front of a couple of hundred young people, and that it was imperative that she be a G-rated belly dancer.  It was all set, and we were excited to see just how red David's face could be!

We met the dancer backstage and she looked great- a true belly dancer with all the bells and whistles!  We again confirmed who she was there for and that it needed to be a conservative performance.  We sat David in a chair, made some sort of introduction, and brought her out.  There were hoots and hollers, and David turned bright pink before she ever started.  But then she began to dance- and our jaws dropped.  If this dance was G-rated, we DID NOT want to see PG!  She was all over David, and the atmosphere became very tense.  From off stage the three amigos began sharing with each other how much we had enjoyed youth ministry and discussing what our next careers might be.  It was awful.  We looked out at the crowd, which was divided into three camps.  The youth were loving it.  The adults who had come over for this special occasion were mortified.  David's wife was ready to faint.   As it all ended, we considered making a break for it before the lynching started, when a small miracle saved us.  David's father, Jack, a well respected pastor himself, was standing, laughing and clapping.  Others who had been planning our demise also began to smile.  Even David's wife was laughing.  Our jobs (and lives) were spared!  We were forgiven to the point that Brent came and spoke for the youth of NCYM that August, and I went to Iowa to speak the following summer.  But for a few minutes, we thought it was the big OOPS...  As it turned out I had years to go and many smaller "oops" to experience before the big one.   And to David Tebbs, wherever you are, I hope someone is reading this to you and making you blush!

Because of Jesus,

The Hall of Fame: Heather Beggs

A very young Heather modeling the latest in balloon wear at the 1987  youth Christmas Party!

As mentioned in previous posts, when I arrived at Springfield Friends Meeting in October of 1986 the youth ministry was in turmoil.  My predecessor, Wallace Sills, had left to become Pastor at Jamestown Friends Meeting, and some of the families had gone with him.  One of those families was the Beggs family.  The three children- Heather, Emily and Mandy- were still around Springfield from time to time, but I didn't have much chance to get to know them.  All of that changed in the summer of 1987.  I was Camp Pastor for a middle school camp at Quaker Lake, and Heather was one of the campers.  Thus began a relationship that is still important to me to this day.

Heather and I wound up on the same "team" for that week of camp.  Thanks in large part to her, that team chose the name "The Boogers (although I remember spelling it 'Buggars')."  We had our very own Booger song to the tune of a popular Dr. Pepper commercial of the day; "I'm a booger, you're a booger, lots of folks you know are boogers, wouldn't you like to be a booger too?"  We had a great week together, along with Laurie Rees from Springfield, and Heather and I connected.  That connection was confirmed when she called me (the famous Heather BBBB call) in the early morning to ask if she could come to Triennials for the day.  She came over and hung out with me most of the day.  After that, things just began to take off!

Over the next 5 years, no one was more at the center of what we did at Springfield than Heather Beggs.  Her personality and energy helped put the charge in our community outreach program we called TNT.  She was part of three great summer trips, two to Myrtle Beach and one to Florida.  She cried her way through Les Miz and a couple of New York trips.  For over a year she counted down to her 16th birthday, and when it came we had the party in our youth room.  She and her friends Keri Vinson and Shelley Godwin (who both became a huge part of my life and will get their own stories later on!) became regular visitors to my office after school, and we talked about everything.  I heard about her love life through the good and the bad;  she came to me for advice on many occasions in her high school days.  Late night phone calls, crazy stories and a shared passion for music kept us talking and laughing.  She always asked me to check her nose to make sure it was clean!  So many of my favorite memories of those years include Heather, and this blog will still have many more stories to tell!

Today Heather Beggs Varner is a wife, a mother of three, and the Director of Quaker Lake Camp.  In 2006 she invited me to be Camp Pastor for high school camp, and that opportunity to work with her was very special to me.  We don't get to see each other much anymore, but I could not be more proud of who she is or what she has accomplished. She is a blessing to so many through her ministry at QLC.  But she is still the same crazy girl I remember, too.  Just yesterday she heard that I had mentioned her in this blog, and she called me and sang the Booger Song to me- the long version!  She will always hold a special place in my heart, and a front row listing in my Youth Group Hall of Fame. 

Because of Jesus,

The Great Hickey Search, Part 2

We entered the Greensboro Airport Marriott (see picture) on a wave of confusion.  The youth were headed to their rooms completely unaware of the door-to-door search that was about to happen.  The adults were primarily split into two camps.  One group was gung-ho and ready for the search.  Those kissing culprits had to be brought to justice!  The rest of us thought this might be the single dumbest thing we had ever been asked to do.

The first group was represented (in my mind) by two sisters from Nahunta, NC.  Jean and Janet Edgerton were unknown to many of us when the event began, but that did not last long!  The Edgerton's were loud and forceful, and quick to take control.  In later years they would both become dear friends of mine and great leaders in the youth programs of North Carolina Yearly Meeting.  Jean's early death a number of years later was a tragedy for so many in NCYM.  But at this point, all I knew was they were going door-to-door searching for a young woman with a hickey, and they were doing it with the passion of Empirical Storm Troopers looking for Princess Leia.  And they were not alone.  Other adults were banging on doors and checking necks as the clock passed midnight.  It was quite a scene.

The second group was represented by myself and Terry Venable.  Terry, his wife Leigh Ann, Marilyn and I were sharing a room that week (Youth Minister = Poverty!).  At first we just went into the room, but as the commotion continued in the halls outside, we went out to watch.  The scene was surreal.  Sensing that "lights out" was not happening for a while, students began to order room service.  They were getting munchies and non-alcoholic frozen drinks, such as Virgin Daiquiris.  Terry and I were laughing so hard at these kids paying $6 for a glorified Slurpee!  The real show, however, were the "interviews" taking place in the rooms of the participants.  The guys were asked if they had kissed anyone that evening.  They girls were asked to show their necks.  It was incredible.  Eventually, Terry and I just slumped down on the floor right outside our room and waited.  Soon we were being visited by youth, many of whom were afraid that the "villains" were going to be sent home- or worse yet, sent to Iowa!  We walked around and visited the rooms of youth from our Meetings and made sure they were OK.  We listened to confessions from couples who were hickey free but had been kissing and were afraid they were in trouble.  Then we went to bed.  Jean and Janet were still searching, still chasing kids back to their rooms, and still patrolling the stairways when we gave it up for the night.

To be completely honest, I have no idea if anyone ever found a hickey that night.  I do know there had been a lot more kissing going on than just the one couple Steve had spotted.  In 28 years of student ministry I was never part of anything quite as ridiculous as The Great Hickey Search.  The event- FUM Triennials for youth- continued to be a rousing success despite this strange evening.  Even the belly dancer (come back Saturday for that tale) couldn't keep this event from being something that was changing the face of Quakerism for many of those present.

The following morning the Jones' and the Venables' were awakened by a very early phone call.  Terry answered the phone, mumbled "hello" and then reached out to hand the phone to me.  "It's for you. It's someone named Heather B..b..b..."  Heather Beggs was about to come flying into our lives at full speed...

Because of Jesus,

The Great Hickey Search, Part 1

hick-ey   [hik-ee]  –noun.   Slang.  A reddish mark left on the skin by a passionate kiss.

The summer of 1987 brought the Friends United Meeting (FUM) Triennial Sessions to Greensboro, NC.  For those not familiar with Quaker "alphabet soup," FUM is a worldwide organization of Quakers that gathers every three years for business and worship- thus the whole triennial name!  This particular gathering was of special interest to me for several reasons.  It was in our backyard, so it was a great opportunity to experience the grand diversity that is Quakerism.  There would be silent Quakers and dancing Friends and everything in between!  It was also the first Triennial to have a full-blown youth program rather than the typical "baby-sitting" that goes on at these large adult events.  The youth (teenagers) would meet and stay at the Greensboro Airport Marriott, a very nice hotel.  There would be speakers, musicians and comedians brought in especially for youth.  And finally, I was interested because I had been asked to lead the music at worship times.  I looked forward to bringing some students from Springfield Friends Meeting and enjoying the event.

The youth program had been planned by a committee of youth workers from around the country, made up primarily of people who held the kind of Yearly Meeting position that I had previously held in New England.   Friends of mine such as David Tebbs, Tom Klaus and Brent Bill were among the leaders.  (Come back Saturday to learn the real scoop on those three at this event!)  The on-site leader of the event was a man named Steve Pedigo, who led the Chicago Fellowship of Friends.  The FOF was a youth based church begun with Young Life style youth program in one of the worst projects in Chicago- Cabrini Green.  Steve, his wife Marlene, and a number of their youth had made the trip to Greensboro.  I had worked with Steve before at Quaker Lake, and knew the circumstances of his ministry.  Once I had some 10 year old FOF kids in my cabin at QLC, and one night some of the other kids started showing their scars from bike wrecks and skate boarding accidents.  The kids from Chicago showed us their bullet wounds...

Needless to say, Steve saw things in a different light than those of us who spent our time working with mostly white, middle class students.  This different point of view is what led to the long night now known as The Great Hickey Search.  All of the youth participants had boarded buses and headed out for a night of Putt-Putt.  As we returned to the Marriott, Steve was standing out front greeting everyone and telling them to head straight for their rooms.  As he did this, he spotted a teenage couple of the back of one bus, where they appeared to be (in the words of Harry Potter) "snogging."   Steve was outraged.  As everyone stood up and began to exit the bus, he could no longer determine who had been in that back seat.  He called all of the adults together and informed us as to what he had seen.  He wanted the offenders brought to justice that night.  When we asked him how we were supposed to know who had been involved, he told us that from what he had witnessed he was certain that the young lady would have a hickey on her neck.  It was 11 PM or so, and he gave us all a task:  Find the hickey, and the young man who had given it.  Tonight!  The Great Hickey Search was on...(to be continued)