30/30: One Particular Harbor

It's week #1 of my 30/30 Vision blog challenge, which will feature a post every Friday for the next 30 weeks. To see the list of topics, click here. Today's subject- Where is home? 

Home is an interesting word. We often refer to the buildings we live in as home. There are many people who think of the community they grew up in as home. Some think that it is the presence of family that turns a house into a home. Many of us have visited unknown places and felt so comfortable there that we announce that it "feels like home!" All of these thoughts were a part of my process as I prepared to choose one place that I consider to be home for this post. But in the end, it seemed the thought that made the most sense to me was the old cliche "home is where your heart is." Old cliches get to be old for a reason...

Much like this weekend's NFL playoffs. my choice came down to a final 4. I grew up in the Guilford College community of Greensboro, NC- and I have great memories of wonderful times and wonderful people there. The house I grew up in, my elementary through high schools, my closest friends and my first youth ministry position at New Garden Friends Meeting were all in Greensboro. There is certainly a great feel of home to Guilford College for me. Option #2 would be High Point, NC- just a few miles from Greensboro but a very different era of my life. Marilyn and I spent the first 8 years of our marriage living in HP and serving Springfield Friends Meeting from 1986-1994. It was there that I learned much about life, marriage and ministry. Choice #3 would be Kissimmee, FL, where I served the First United Methodist Church from 1994-200o, and where Will was born. So many people who are still valued in my life today come from my years there, and are such a blessing to me even now. Amazing stories and incredible years! And finally, there is my current home of Tampa. No doubt it is home to Will. We have been here almost 13 years, with a quick side trip to Georgia in the middle. We love it here, and expect to be here a while longer. Four choices. Four homes. But the idea here is to choose the ONE place that is truly home. And so I shall...

As many great memories, friends and moments as I have in all of those places (and just so you know, Quaker Lake Camp could have easily made the list as well) there is only one that is my One Particular Harbor. It's Springfield Friends Meeting. Yes, my home is a church. For 8 wonderful years the people of that church and that community were our family. They took care of us. They were more than friends. We lived in a house- a beat up, tiny, old house- that they provided for us diagonally across the street from the Meeting. It was also across the street from our senior pastor Max and his lovely wife Avis- and they were GREAT neighbors. It was, without much competition, the worst house I have ever lived in. There was no space, no central AC in the summer, an ancient oil furnace (that blew up once and left everything covered in black dust) and a goofy little bathroom. Most of the windows would not open, having been painted shut over and over again long before we moved in. I replaced the kitchen floor myself, and actually made it better in doing so- which if you know me tells you a lot about what it looked like when we got there. So suffice it to say that it wasn't the house that made Springfield home. But that house was often full of people we love. Youth, church members, our friends from other places and

"Family" on my 30th birthday

family made that house feel warm and cozy instead of stuffy and tiny. There were Christmas parties, Super Bowl parties, chili cook-offs and more. We were also often in the homes of church members, celebrating special events and milestones with them. We experienced true koinonia at Springfield, and that is a rare and wonderful thing. We've been gone almost 20 years now, and many of those relationships are still strong. God blessed us with a home.

And in return for the love we received from that church family, we were blessed by God to be able to build a student ministry that changed the community. Much of what I did as a youth minister in the much larger churches to follow those years was birthed at Springfield. And so many of the students we attracted and shared life with have gone on to do amazing things as adults. It still makes my heart jump to hear from any of them, to see pictures of their families on Facebook and to read of their accomplishments- they are truly my extended family. One day soon I will be able to travel again. And when I can, there WILL BE a reunion. I miss those folks so much.

But the thing that makes Springfield my definitive One Particular Harbor is the criteria I mentioned at the top- "home is where the heart is." And so often my heart aches to be with the people I know and love through my years at Springfield Friends Meeting. Every Christmas Eve, every time they advertise a ham & egg supper or a fish fry, every time there's a Friend Day, every time an old friend passes away or a former student has a major life event- I LONG to be there. My heart- and Marilyn's heart- are often there in spirit. We are blessed to have so many friends from so many places in our lives, including many of our very best friends who are not from that era. But for me, after a lot of soul searching, I can tell you that Springfield is still home. As Jimmy Buffett once wrote:

"There's this one particular harbor, sheltered from the wind

Where the children play on the shore each day

and all are safe within.

A most mysterious calling harbor, so far but yet so near

Where I can see the day when my hair's full grey

And I finally disappear..."

Home is where you feel safe, loved and needed. I have identified my home. Where is yours?

Because of Jesus,

Remembering Max

Max & I

Today I want to remember one of the most special men I have ever known.  I knew that I was going to write about someone who had been a spiritual influence and inspiration in my life as part of the Blog Challenge, and when I received word from my dear friend and former secretary boss Millie Simmons that my friend, pastor and mentor Max Rees had passed away I knew who I would write about.  I served under Max as Director of Youth & Christian Education at Springfield Friends Meeting from 1986-1994.  Max had a remarkable influence on so many, and today I remember the love and faith of his wife Avis, his children Bob, Barbara, Tom, Margaret, Rachel, Becky and Cathy and the impact they had on my life.  Some of this appeared previously on this blog under the title Influences: Max Rees.


When Marilyn and I arrived at SFM in 1986, Max Rees had already been there over 2o years.  The Meeting was coming out of a very difficult time.   Attendance was down, and so was enthusiasm.  But Max did not waiver in his faith in God or in the people of Springfield.  And his wife Avis was just as strong.  Both of them were of great encouragement to Marilyn and I, and we worked as a team to help bring Springfield back.

Max had a classic preacher's voice and total command of a pulpit.  My dear friend Patsy Hill once told me that "when Max doesn't preach it's like a PTA meeting instead of church."  Unfortunately, she said that right after I had filled in for him! (HA!)  He visited the area hospitals every day; he visited people in their homes on a regular basis as well.  I not only worked along side him for those 8 years, but Marilyn and I lived across the street from them during that time as well.  He and Avis called the police and kept our home from being robbed one Christmas Eve.  He had a great sense of humor.  I remember one morning, after he had been in a very difficult discussion with one of his daughters, sitting across from him as he looked at me with a straight face and said, "Carl, women are not our kind of people."  He had a witty comment for most every occasion, but was never silly.  And perhaps most importantly, he trusted me with guiding his grandchildren by encouraging their participation in our youth ministry.  Jon, Stacy, Laurie, Mike, Beth, Ben, Jill, Allison, Mary, Erin, Will and David were the heart of our student ministry, and I love them all.  He welcomed us into his home from the very beginning, and his family became our family.  To read more about that you can visit another vintage post, Sunday Dinner.  

That is not to say that Max & Avis were perfect.  They had been there a very long time and had many preconceived notions of how everything should be done. They were in bed by "Quaker Midnight" (10pm) and up before the sun.  Avis never threw anything away, so we had Sunday School materials dating back to the Ice Age!  Max often disappeared in the afternoons to go feed his cows.  These were minor flaws.  The fact is, they gave their lives each and every day to serve the people of Springfield, and in doing so set a standard for me to live up to.  Through blessed times and struggles their faith did not waiver, and their love for God, for each other, for their family and for their "flock" never changed.  They were indeed the "First Family" of Springfield.


The late Rich Mullins wrote a song about his family in 1989 called First Family, from his album Never Picture Perfect.  In the early 90's I rewrote part of it to fit the Rees family, planning to sing it when Max retired.  He was still going strong when I left in 1994, so I never performed it.  But I would like to share the words now.  They don't all fit perfectly- and some of it is how I imagine things might have been- but they express how I see Max and Avis...

Those folks they were always the first family to arrive

with 9 people jammed into a car that seated 5

With one bathroom to bathe and shave in eight of 'em stood in line

There was no hot water for laundry, but they all did just fine

Talk about your miracles, talk about your faith

Max, he could make things grow out of Indiana clay

and Avis could make a gourmet meal out of homemade bread and beans

They worked to give faith hands and feet, and somehow gave it wings

I can still hear Max fussing, he's working late on on the farm

the cows are out of the fence again and the tractor just won't start

and Avis is doing laundry, I can see it waving on the line

They just counted on Jesus through the pain and strain of hard times

Talk about your miracles, talk about your faith

Max, he could make things grow out of Carolina clay

and Avis could make a gourmet meal out of pecan pie and beans

They worked to give faith hands and feet, and somehow gave it wings

Somehow they raised 7 children, and you know that some things went wrong

but the pain didn't leave them crippled, and the scars just made them strong

Never picture perfect, just a preacher man and his wife

who somehow knew the value of hard work, good love and real life

Talk about your miracles, talk about your faith...

Max has now joined the "great cloud of witnesses" I heard him preach about so often.  He will be missed by his 7 children who called him Daddy; by his over 20 grandchildren who called him Papa; and by hundreds of friends who knew who him simply as Max.  His life inspired me to want to be more like Jesus by being more like him.  There is no higher compliment.  My prayers are with the family- we love and miss you all.

Because of Jesus,

Why Jesus? (Blog Challenge #2)

This week's post in the month long blog challenge is supposed to answer the following question- Why Jesus?  How did I come to be a Christ-follower when there are so many option to choose from in this world?  My initial thought was to go all theological on you, but then I remembered how much I hate theological arguments and how seldom they convince anyone of anything.  So instead, let's look at these three things that have impacted my faith in Jesus.


The first factor is history.  Because his life was recorded in so many different places in so much detail by so many different witnesses, even the staunchest of atheists cannot argue that Jesus never existed and taught.  His death by crucifixion is a historical fact, which proves his teaching had aggravated the leaders of the day, be they Roman or Jewish.  And there were hundreds of people in Jerusalem who claimed to have seen him AFTER he was supposed to be dead, and who witnessed the ascension.  We know that he was here.  The question then becomes whether or not we believe he was the Son of God.  I grew up in a church in which many people believed that Jesus was an awesome teacher, a great man- but not necessarily the Messiah.  I know now that that those beliefs cannot be accurate.  Jesus was either who he said he was- the Son of God - or he was one of the great liars in all of history. And I believe history itself shows him to be the Holy Lamb of God, sent to save me from my sins.


Secondly, Jesus is the fulfillment of the promise that God would never stop loving his people.  The entire narrative of scripture, from the Garden of Eden in Genesis to the New Jerusalem in the Revelation of John, is about God's search to connect with his creation.  In every other religion, the story is about man's search to find a god.  It's about trying to be good enough to deserve a god.  You can earn your way to god.  Jesus came because humanity had proven over and over again that we were no good on our own; we needed a savior.  Yaweh came looking for us.  Other religions ask, "what have you done for me lately?"  In Christianity, Jesus announces from the cross that "it is finished"  It's done.  I took care of it for you.  God has found YOU.  Awesome.


Finally- and most importantly- I choose Jesus because I KNOW him to be real.  He's not just a character from an old book, he (in the form of the Holy Spirit) walks with me every day.  I speak with him often.  And he talks back.  Not in a booming voice or through burning bushes, but through the silence and the people in my life.   He saved my life through his redemptive love and amazing grace.  To quote the band Newsboys, "that's why Jesus is the final answer to who I want my God to be."  So why Jesus?  Because- that's why!  Blessings to you all!


Because of Jesus,

Blog Challenge, Week 1: Saved!

I grew up in the church.  As a small child I attended Sunday School, Vacation Bible School and all of the worship services and church picnics you can imagine.  By the age of 10 I had memorized my share of bible verses.  I knew the hymns.  I could recite the Apostle's Creed.  And to be honest, I was under the impression being able to do all of those things made me a Christian.  I had yet to learn the truth that going to church doesn't make you a Christ-follower anymore than sitting in a garage makes you a car...


When I was about 10 my parents quit going to church because of a split in a church they loved.  For a few years I stayed home on Sunday mornings- and I enjoyed it.  I didn't miss church at all.  When I was in 8th grade, my best friend Steve Semmler convinced me to go to youth group with him.  I wish I could tell you I went because deep in my soul I longed to know Jesus, but the fact is I went because of a girl.  New Garden Friends Meeting was a very important stop on my faith journey, but we didn't use language like "saved" or "born again."  In fact, that language both scared and confused us.  I remember being at a gathering of youth groups and going around a circle introducing ourselves.  The other youth were saying their names and the exact date that they had been "saved."  We said our names and that we liked to play basketball.  I didn't have a salvation story.  I was learning about Jesus, but I did not yet know him.


My growth continued when I became involved in a Young Life Campaigner Group.  There I studied scripture and shared experiences with a group of guys who came from a different background than I did, and who understood more about giving their lives to Christ.  Living in the way God intended became very important to me, and I was identified more and more as a Christian, by myself and by others.  Volunteering at Quaker Lake Camp and talking with kids about Jesus continued my journey.  By the time I began working at the camp at age 18, I was committed to following the teachings of Christ.  I had seen old friends whose lives had taken a different path from my  own, and who were now living dark, painful lives.  I felt like I had been saved by Jesus.  I would feel that way many times over the coming years. But I still had no definitive date, no concrete answer to the "When were you saved?" question.  


I began working for churches as a youth leader when I was 18.  For the next 28 years I led teenagers in their search for Jesus, always reminding them that while "once saved, always saved" may be a theological truth, the fact is that we are in constant need of saving- and Jesus will never let us down.  Some experience salvation in a magical moment, with trumpets and lights flashing; many of us are saved because we allow Jesus to slowly, deeply consume our hearts.  The problem with the latter is that it doesn't give me an exciting story to tell; it doesn't give me a date to recite.  But it still gives me a Savior, and Jesus has played that role in my life over and over again in my nearly 52 years of life.  


Over the years I have often feared being one of those people I have seen so many times in church or at youth camps who find their "salvation" in an emotional response to a sermon or a tragedy.  I have witnessed as far too many people have walked down the aisle at church to the strains of Just As I Am; they have knelt at the altar just as they are; and they head back to their seats just as they were.  I have often doubted the sincerity of those who could name the date and time of their salvation, because I have wondered if was simply emotion.  But in April of 2007, in the midst of the darkest days of my life, in the midst of repenting of the greatest sin of my life, I found myself in tears, on my knees before God asking to be saved one more time.  And in that moment, I was filled with the Holy Spirit in a new and amazing way.  And I have not been the same since.


I realize this is not a normal testimony, but I have not lived a normal life.  I have been a Christian since a very early age.  I have been a committed Christ-follower since I was a teenager.  As an adult I led many students into relationships with Jesus, and gave my life to him in service.  But if you want to know when I was saved- REALLY saved by the overwhelming love and grace of Jesus Christ- I'd have to say Easter Sunday, 2007.  Walking with Christ, learning to trust him, sharing life with him- all of these things are part of the pilgrimage. And the journey never ends.  Brennan Manning once said that "The worst thing is not crying out in the darkness; the worst thing is having no one in the darkness to cry out to..."  Knowing that Jesus is there in the darkness- not hoping, not thinking, not wishing, but KNOWING- that's my salvation story.  Thanks for listening.


Because of Jesus,

The Blog Challenge

My Twitter friend Sierra White has organized a blog challenge for some of the Christian bloggers she knows, and once a week during the month of October I will be participating in this adventure.  She has give us assignments for each week, and they are as follows:

Week #1 -Blog about how you got saved…your testimony.
Week #2- Why Jesus?  Why not Allah or Mohammad?  Why not Buddha?  What makes you so sure Jesus IS THE WAY?
Week #3- Pick a Blogger in the group of bloggers who are in on this and do an interview of sorts with them on your blog. It's an opportunity for bloggers to get to know each other, promote each others blogs, etc.
Week #4- Blog about 2 people who inspire you in your walk with Christ.  Whether it be a friend, mentor, or even someone you don't personally know.


I am excited to be a part of this challenge.  It is always good to take a long hard look not only at WHAT you believe, but also WHY.  It is also always good to look back at your spiritual roots, to examine where you came from and how you got to where you are now.  The first assignment is not an easy one for me, because I cannot look back at a specific instance that led to me committing my my life to Christ.  Instead it was a series of events that took me down a path that twisted, turned and changed me at every stop.  I look forward to sharing that story with you tomorrow.  We may not all use the same language or even agree on the things we believe, but there is one thing I know to be true.  Encountering Jesus doesn't just change a person once- it continues to change them over and over again.  Details tomorrow...


Because of Jesus,