Equipping the Called

Some days I feel totally unworthy of talking to other people about Jesus. You know what I mean?  Who am I to offer anyone spiritual guidance, or even to talk about youth ministry?  After all, I blew it.  I sinned big time. I lost my ministry. I left people disappointed. I am a mess! I should be that last person God would call upon to write a blog and talk about about faith with an ever-growing audience. It seems to me that I am ill equipped to serve the Creator.  I mean, who am I?  And then I read my bible...

• Noah may have been the "one righteous man" God found before destroying the Earth, but that didn't stop him from drinking himself into a naked stupor in the days after the flood. (Genesis 9 :20-25) 
• Moses went on and on and on about how how he couldn't speak well enough to be God's messenger in Egypt.  Later he lost his chance to see the Promised Land by disobeying God. Yet he is among the giants of faith for leading the children of Israel out of captivity. (Exodus)
• David was called "a man after God's own heart." He wrote many of the Psalms. He also committed adultery (and perhaps even a sex offense) with the grandaughter of a trusted adviser, and then conspired to have her husband killed in battle. (2 Samuel 11)
• Jeremiah complained that he was too young and not fit to be a prophet. God told him to get himself ready, and he eventually led the nation of Israel to repentance. Not bad for a young whippersnapper who didn't want to go...
• The birth of Jesus was foretold to Elizabeth and her husband Zechariah by the angel Gabriel.  Zechariah doubted Gabe, and was made mute for the next 9 months or so.  He messed up- but he was the father of John the Baptist.  Still, you should never doubt an angel.  (Luke 1:5-22)
• Mary was just a teenager, and not even a very special teenager, engaged to a carpenter, when she was chosen by God to be the mother of Jesus.  As the song says, What a strange way to save the world!
• Simon Peter was a...well, he was an idiot! He got so many things wrong, was rebuked by Jesus on several occasions and denied even knowing him on three. And yet Jesus knew all along that "upon this rock I will build my church."  And he did. The idiot came through when it really counted.  Peter is the patron-saint of screw-ups like me.
• Saul killed Christ-followers.  That was his job, and he loved it.  But an encounter with the Risen Christ gave him a new name (Paul) and a new calling, and he became one of the most important men in history, spreading the gospel all over the known world.  

Now I am in NO WAY comparing my accomplishments and contributions to the world of faith to any of these great people.  I will however, compare all of us to their weaknesses and failures. None of them were anxious or ready to serve God, and many of them felt ill equipped to handle the work given them.  But they did.  One of my favorite little stories in scripture concerns a man named Ananias.  In Acts 9:10-19 he is told to go find a man named Saul of Tarsus (killer of Christians- see above) and restore his sight.  When Ananias points out that Saul is not a nice man, God says GO!  And so Ananias went. It wasn't reasonable. Ananias had no special training. Ananias did not want to go. And yet, Ananias went. He just went.

And so I sit here writing with the realization that while I am not ready, not trained and far from perfect, God can and will use me anyway! I don't know who said it first, but it has been said many times that "God does not call the equipped; He equips the called."  It is not about ability, it is about availability.  It is not about skill, it is about faith.  And if God can still use a mess like me to make difference, just think what he could do if we in the church would let go of our own issues and simply GO...and DO!  Something to ponder, isn't it?

Because of Jesus,

Identified

Today I write as part of a sychroblog.  If you are not sure exactly what that is, it's OK- neither am I.  But my friend Tracee Persiko invited me me to be a part of this special day of blogging to help kick-off a book she helped write entitled Inciting Incidents. The basic idea is to get a bunch of bloggers writing about moments that changed their lives forever, pushing their story forward.  To read more stories of Inciting Incidents, click here.  This is one of mine.

When I graduated high school in 1977 I knew I wanted to be a writer. I had prepared myself for years, working on school newspapers, writing articles for a community paper, and serving as first sports editor and later editor-in-chief of our high school yearbook.  During those same years God had changed my life by giving me a new group of friends through a church youth group who had become the center of my life.  I spent my first year of college still planning to go into journalism, but feeling a tug at my heart to find some way to be involved in youth ministry and make a difference in the lives of young people- the same way my youth group had for me.  But to be honest, it was tug I was trying hard to ignore.

In the summer of 1978 I was working at Quaker Lake Camp at a cabin counselor.  One of the first weeks of camp was a 4th & 5th grade camp, and I had a camper named Geoff Robinson.  His father, David, was the pastor at Centre Friends Meeting, a Quaker church located just down highway 62 from QLC.  As the summer moved along there were a number of campers from Centre Friends, including several at senior high camp.  A few weeks after that high school camp one of those students, a young woman named Robin Davis, was killed in a car wreck.   As the QLC family sought to deal with the grief, I found myself providing an ear to listen and a shoulder to cry on to many folks, both staff and campers.  The funeral was held at Centre Friends, and I took a delegation from camp to attend. It was a very emotional day, and again, I found myself offering comfort to many.  It seemed very natural to me, and was simply the right thing to do.

The following week Pastor David Robinson came down to camp one afternoon and said he wanted to speak with me in private.  He thanked for the support I had provided the previous week, and said he had something to tell me- and something to ask me.  He wondered if I had ever considered going into ministry- specifically youth ministry.  I said I had thought about it, but not very seriously.  He then said, "Well you should.  As a matter of fact, as soon as camp is over, I would like for you to be our youth pastor at Centre. You see Carl, God has gifted you to do ministry."  Almost without a thought, I accepted- and for the next 28 years youth ministry was my life's calling.

I had felt the tugs on my heart, and enjoyed the passion of ministry at QLC, but until David Robinson identified my gift, I was unaware. Until that moment when he spoke to me about being gifted by God to do God's work among teenagers, it was just something that seemed like fun.  Suddenly, I had a calling.  Suddenly, I knew in my hear that my life was headed in a brand new direction.  My introduction to student ministry at Centre Friends started me down a path that would take me many places and give me the honor and blessing of serving youth all over the country.  There have been many inciting incidents in my life, but very few that did more to determine the course of my adult life and change my story as did the day I was identified as a youth pastor by David Robinson.  Even though my time as a youth pastor ended in 2007, I continue to serve the youth ministry community through my blog and my ministry with former students and current youth pastors. The story that began back in 1978 still continues today...

Because of Jesus,

Welcome to Tampa!

Marilyn and I flew in to Tampa from Chicago late one night in August of 2001 with very mixed feelings about the next day's interviews with Wesley Memorial UMC.  On one hand, we were excited about the possibilities of a new ministry, a new church home and being back in Florida.  On the other hand, we had very little idea what to expect from the church.  A phone interview had revealed some issues and some promise, but other than that we knew very little. The trip got off to a slow start when no one was at the airport to pick us up, but after a quick phone call that was taken care of.   Senior Pastor Jerry Sweat drove us to our hotel, a Doubletree overlooking beautiful Tampa Bay.  He would pick us up the next morning and take us to the church for a day of interviews and meeting people.  It was on.

Jerry was tied up the next morning, but he sent Robyn Smith to pick us up.  Robyn was a young woman who volunteered with the youth program (along with her husband Ed), and they would become very special to us over the coming years.  I didn't really know much about Tampa.  I knew it had a bay, had the Bucs and the Devil Rays, and was a fairly large city.  The area our hotel was in was beautiful and very modern- even a little touristy.  As we drove the very strange route to the church (Tampa roads, we would learn, were designed by a maze builder.  They did not want you to ever find your way!) we started down a road lined with run-down strip shopping centers, old buildings and apartment complexes.  Many of the names were Hispanic.  Robyn informed us we were arriving at the church, and as we pulled into the left turn lane my heart sank.  There sat WMUMC across a grass field- probably 100 yards from the road.  It was very unimpressive.  It looked old and a bit beat up.  It was much smaller than any church I had ever served.  I found myself looking at Marilyn and immediately judging this book by it's cover.  Expectations were quickly lowered.

We were warmly greeted as arrived inside the building.  While my initial judgement of the facility as a whole had been fair, the worship space was gorgeous.  And as we began the interview process and meeting people, I began to feel much more at ease.  Once the interview process began, I felt like they were testing my endurance as much as they were curious about my faith and my philosophies.  Group after group just kept arriving at the church to meet with me, in addition to the lunch "grilling" at Red Lobster.  I kept reminding myself how badly they had just been burned by a couple of past staff members and tried to cut them some slack.  But still- this was intense!

Right after school let out I met with a group of the students involved in the ministry.  They seemed hesitant to ask questions until one of the older youth, Kyle Bell, asked me a very unusual question: "How do you feel about dating?"  I was a bit confused, but managed a witty reply:  "I'm not sure.  After all, we just met!"  It turned out that the previous regime had spent a great deal of time discouraging the kids from hanging out with the opposite sex.  They even made them sit on opposite sides of the bus on trips.  I assured them that would not be my policy.  After that, the questions started flying.  I really liked the students I met and felt like we connected.

All in all I thought the day went well.  George Woods, the head of the personnel committee, was also the marketing director for the Bucs, and he gave us Bucs hats to wear home.  Marilyn and I had a lot to think and pray about.  There were issues, just as there are at every church.  Due to a snafu with keys, we had still not seen the inside of the house we would live in.  There were questions.  We returned to Chicago to see what God had to say to us, and discovered we that we felt called to Tampa.  We were moving back to Florida.  But not just yet...

Because of Jesus,

They Need A Hero

The final stop on my 2001 job search turned out to be Wesley Memorial UMC in Tampa.  Before I begin to tell you the story of how I wound up at WMUMC, I need to backtrack a bit and tell you something I still needed to learn about myself.

 By 2001 I had developed a "Hero Complex"  (The Green Lantern is one of my favs- can't wait for the movie this summer!).  The ministries that I felt called to over the years had all been seriously flawed, and I had sensed that God wanted to use my gifts to repair them.  When I went to New England Yearly Meeting of Friends in 1985, part of the reason was because I felt like the youth of that region needed more Christ-centered leadership and more personality- and I was the one who could provide those things.  Part of the attraction of my move to Springfield Friends Meeting (aside from going back to NC and getting married!)in 1986 was that the church was falling apart.  A staff member (the one in charge of youth) had left over disagreements with the Senior Pastor and had taken a part of the congregation with him.  The student ministry would need to be totally rebuilt.  I relished the thought of that.  I left SFM in 1994 (even though I was still in love with the church and the people there) after I felt God calling me to the First United Methodist Church of Kissimmee, where a once thriving youth ministry was falling apart after having 3 different leaders in 2 years.  Again, I had great confidence that I was God's man for the job.  When I left there to escape The Pastor Who Shall Not Be Named in 2000, part of the reason the Union Church of Hinsdale was so appealing to me was that they needed my skills and experience so badly- no one had ever really done youth ministry there.  I loved swooping in and being the hero.  And to some extent, I had been successful at every stop.  I loved seeing tangible progress- watching a ministry rise from the ashes.  I know now that my heroism was not particularly healthy, for me or for them.  But by 2001, this had become a part of my job search DNA.

The initial information I received in my phone interview with WMUMC indicated that this was a church that was right in my wheelhouse.  The Senior Pastor, Jerry Sweat, was young and exciting, plus he had 2 kids of youth group age.  Tampa was a great fit for my family- close to my parents, close to Walt Disney World and near all of our dear friends in Kissimmee.  And the youth ministry was in complete chaos.  The previous Youth Pastor had been the wife of the Associate Pastor, and they had left WMUMC and taken a section of the church with them.  A number of key student leaders (including their daughters) were gone.  Another very active family had moved away.  The youth who remained had not been terribly excited about the direction of the ministry in the first place; now they were skeptical anything good could come from all of the turmoil. They had a great youth choir and some good volunteers in place, but overall things were a mess. It seemed like exactly the kind of situation I was seeking, and the kind of place God had often called me to.  Marilyn and I flew down for an whirlwind day of interviews in August of 2001.  Those stories- including how I got asked out on a date- are coming Wednesday.  Stay blessed!

Because of Jesus,

Eyes Wide Open

As I continued my search for a new church home in the summer of 2001 I was invited to interview at a very large United Methodist Church in Baton Rouge, LA.  I had participated in a very spirited and lengthy telephone interview with their search committee, and my interest had been piqued.  I had learned it was a nearly 6000 member church, with a thriving youth ministry.  The youth had their own building with a gym and multiple classrooms.  A Youth Ministry Team was already in place.  The Senior Pastor seemed to be a solid leader and preacher.  I chatted a bit with the man I would be following in the position, and he had glowing things to say about the church.  And they had a house for us.  After much prayer and discussion with Marilyn about the location, we agreed I should fly down and take a look.

At that stage of my youth ministry career, I was pretty much done with "candidating" at churches.  I had enough confidence and experience to feel like I was interviewing the church, not the other way around.  I had my eyes wide open for traps or situations that seemed destined to be trouble.  My last two memories at this point were The Pastor Who Shall Not Be Named in Kissimmee and a church where I didn't fit at all in Hinsdale. I was excited to be in Baton Rouge, but I was cautious.

As I began meeting with the search committee red flags started popping up everywhere.  The church did have almost 6000 members, but Sunday morning attendance was closer to 500.  The "thriving" student ministry was actually small and limited.  In fact, everything was scheduled around sporting events at LSU (although getting to spend some Saturday nights in Death Valley did sound pretty awesome!).  The Youth Ministry Team was still extremely loyal to the previous youth pastor, whom the youth building was named after. He was still going to be on staff.  In fact, he would be my supervisor.  AWKWARD!  The Senior Pastor confided in me that he was not planning to be there much longer.  The house they had mentioned MIGHT be available for us, but that was still in question.  The whole thing was a disaster- and yet I found myself hoping they would offer me the job.  I was tired of looking.  I was no longer seeking to be called by God- I just wanted out of Hinsdale.  Fortunately, God was still in control, and the offer never came.  I was rescued from myself.  Which left me free to make my visit to Wesley Memorial UMC in Tampa- and the story of my journey there will start next Monday.  Come along for the ride!

Because of Jesus,

The WOW Factor

On the Sunday of our interview weekend in 1999 we attended church at the Union Church of Hinsdale.  It happened to be Commitment Sunday, a time of lifting up the church budget and asking members to make a financial pledge for the following year.  I already knew that Union Church was a very traditional church in terms of the layout of the sanctuary, the music and its' worship style.  This concerned me a bit, so I was was anxious to see what worship felt like.  I was astonished when as Rev. Dick Nye began his sermon, he was interrupted by a man walking down the aisle dressed in biblical garb.  This man ascended to the pulpit and introduced himself as Moses.  What followed was a wonderfully creative skit on giving that had the congregation laughing and involved.  It felt neither stuffy nor overly traditional, and it put many of my fears to rest.  Once again, I was impressed.

Lunch with a few of the church staff members did little to change my impression.  Dick Nye, Barb Cathey, Mark Toole and others seemed like people it would be a joy to work with.  They all said glowing things about the church and about the possibilities for student ministry there- with the right leadership. I found out that Barb and I would share a secretary.  I had never had my own secretary before (although Millie from Springfield might argue that point!).  They informed me that the two areas of youth ministry that seemed to be working at Union were a hand bell choir (see album-yes, album- cover at top) and a Spring Break Mission Trip they called Work Tour.  They told me that the church contained a wide range of theologies, and wanted to know about my comfort level with those who believed differently than I did.  Having at various times been one of the more liberal believers in North Carolina and perhaps the most conservative Christian in all of New England, I felt uniquely qualified to handle the situation.  I left lunch feeling more and more like this might be the place.

More visiting with David Knecht and Mary McKenzie also helped.  These were two loving, caring Christ-followers who had huge hearts both for youth and for the "least of these" in Chicagoland.  They both loved Jesus, and both of them would be there to help.  Mary was a stay-at-home mom and David had sold his computer company and was basically retired- at age 35 or so.  He wanted to learn everything I knew about youth ministry- it had become his new passion.  Everything I had learned about Union Church was leading me to think that this was where God wanted me next.  Marilyn and I flew home still worried about how far away it was (and about the lack of contemporary music, but the staff seemed to think I could have an impact on that) but otherwise just praying that God would give us a clear answer on moving.

Looking back later, it was easy to see how I was seduced by Union Church.  It was the WOW Factor.  First, there was the feeling that they needed me- not someone like me, but ME!- if their youth ministry was ever to be all it could be.  Secondly there was the money.  Not just the huge salary, the nice house in a nearby neighborhood and the other benefits, but the opportunity to do ministry with an almost unlimited budget.  There was the church staff and the people already in place to be molded into a Youth Ministry Team.  David and Mary were amazing people, and I could not wait to get to know them better.  I would have great people to work with.  And finally, the skit at worship that morning had convinced me that despite being an older, traditional church, worship was creative.  I looked at all of that and said WOW!  And after some time praying about it, Marilyn and I looked at all of that and said YES.

Remember what I wrote yesterday about seeing only what we want to see?  In the end, worship was actually seldom creative at UC.  The money was not what it seemed to be.  The Allegro Hand Bell Choir turned out to be in competition with the youth ministry in many ways.  There were people excited about building a student ministry, but the youth and parents were not really part of that group.  And perhaps most importantly, there were very few people in that church with the love for Jesus Christ that I had seen in the staff and in Mary and David.  I'll write more about all of that later on.  Before we headed to Hinsdale, we had a long way to go at FUMC-K.  Those stories will resume on Monday.  Tomorrow it's another Moment With Mullins!  See you then.

Because of Jesus,

Brave New World

Marilyn and I flew to Chicago in the autumn of 1999 to interview with the Union Church of Hinsdale.  We had no idea what to expect.  We knew very little about Chicago and almost nothing about Hinsdale.  We knew no one in the area.  David Knecht (pictured; he's on the right), the co-head of the Search Committee, was meeting at the airport- and we had no idea what he looked like.  It was all a great mystery.

David was there to meet us, and as we drove the 25 miles or so out to Hinsdale he talked excitedly about the weekend they had planned for us.  We were headed for the house of Mary and Tim McKenzie.  Mary was actually co-head of the committee with David, and her home would be the center of operations for the weekend.  Before heading there to meet the committee over lunch, we stopped in downtown Hinsdale to get our first look at the village and the church.  Both were like something out of a movie.  The church was large, old and majestic.  It was located just a block from downtown and across the street from the middle school.  Hinsdale was a beautiful little village.  My dear friend Pat Pribyl from Kissimmee had once lived in the area, and she would later tell me that "Hinsdale is what Celebration (the Disney planned community near Walt Disney World) wants to be when it grows up."  After a quick look around we were off to the McKenzie's home.

We knew right away that we were in a different world.  The house was not any larger than the rest of the homes we saw in the village- but it was HUGE.  As we were shown to our room we were amazed to discover the house had 9 bathrooms.  Nine.  We would later learn that the average price of a home in Hinsdale was $850,000.  We recovered from our initial shock and began a very long day of interaction and interviews.  I met with the committee all afternoon while someone took Marilyn around to see more of the community. 

The interview was the longest and most amazing I have ever experienced.  They questioned me about every experience I had ever had related to student ministry.  I had to recap my entire career.  I had to explain in great detail my philosophy of ministry.  I was tested on my knowledge of Purpose Drive Youth Ministry.  They wanted to hear all about The Pastor Who Shall Not Be Named and why I wanted to leave Kissimmee.  Every member of the committee had questions.  And then they began to talk about salary and benefits.  I was stunned.  They were offering more than double my FUMC-K salary and better benefits.  It was a huge job they wanted done, and they knew they needed someone with experience to do it- and they were willing to pay for it.  The power of my ego (thinking I was the only man for the job) and the money began a slow seduction of my soul; one that I would remain completely unaware of for quite some time.  For now, I just knew I really enjoyed this group of people.  By dinner time I was exhausted.  But not done.

That night the McKenzie's were hosting a party for Michael Surratt.  Michael was the church's longtime organist and hand bell director who had just spent a year on sabbatical.  A paid sabbatical.  I had been in youth ministry for over 20 years and no one had ever even mentioned a sabbatical.  The only sabbatical I had ever been a part of was sleeping on the floor in in the youth room at FUMC-K at our Radical Sabbaticals. At Union Church, Michael had taken one because it was required every 7 years!   And now they were welcoming him back with a party.  I was really growing to like this place.  At the party I met dozens of new people, and they all had questions as well.  I was getting the feeling that this church really cared about this Youth Pastor position.  And that was a great thing...

Tomorrow I will tell you more about David, Mary and the staff of Union Church.  I was about to be fooled by people who had no desire to fool me.  Sometimes we only see what we want to see...

Becasue of Jesus,

Meanwhile, back in 1999...

In the midst of all of the madness of the unending e-mails, phone calls and interviews as I sought to escape The Pastor Who Shall Not Be Named, I was contacted by the Union Church of Hinsdale (pictured).  After a phone interview with several members of their Search Committee I was very intrigued.  The head of the committee was a man named David Knecht, and he seemed to know his stuff.  He had spoken with members of the Youth Specialties staff seeking to get a handle on what they should look for in a Youth Pastor.  He had the entire committee reading Doug Field's excellent book Purpose Driven Youth Ministry (which had been a huge influence on the past few years of my own ministry) to get a feel for what a student ministry could look like at Union Church.  He sent me a questionnaire to complete.  It was very thorough, asking about my philosophy of ministry, my beliefs and my leadership style.  They wanted to know what books I had been reading and what other ministries I felt I could contribute to.  It presented me with scenarios and asked me how I would respond in certain situations.  I was impressed.

Union Church was a large church in Hinsdale, a very wealthy western suburb of Chicago.  Very wealthy.  It seemed to me it was a church with the desire and the resources to really reach youth in the name of Jesus.  A youth program had been in place for many years, and in the 1960's and 70's it had been quite vibrant.  It had dropped of dramatically over the years, and they were looking to go a new direction.  They need someone who could jump start things.  They thought I might be their man.  My ego told me the same thing... 

There were (in the beginning) only two major obstacles I could see.  One, this place was in Chicago.  It was hours away from my family, from Marilyn's family and from our friends.  It was a long ride to Walt Disney World and Myrtle Beach.  We would be facing this without any of the people and things we knew and loved.  Secondly, I knew almost nothing about the United Church of Christ, the denomination that Union Church was connected to.  At first I had thought they were Church of Christ, which meant no music in worship, and I would have never considered that.  I discovered that to be wrong, but I knew little else.  I began to research and found that the UCC was (in my mind, anyway) a cross between the Quakers and the Methodists I had been serving (more on that in a future post).  Marilyn and I decided that I should at least accept their offer to fly us up for an interview. 

Before flying to Chicago, I went into the office of The Pastor Who Shall Not Be Named and tried to speak with him about what was going on at FUMC-K.  I told him how much I loved that church and how much I loved the students I served there, the Youth Ministry Team we had put together, and the staff I worked beside.  I told him I wanted to stay, but I needed to know some things were open for discussion, like returning to a more contemporary worship style and a freedom to do ministry the way we had been doing it before he arrived.  I was promised nothing.  He might as well have said, "Bon Voyage, Carl!"  I was headed to Hinsdale.  Tomorrow I will tell you the story of the never-ending interview, and the beginning of a seduction.  Don't miss it!

Because of Jesus,

An Unexpected Visit

I should make a full disclosure here: I am a huge Lord of the Rings fan.  I have read the books of the trilogy (plus The Hobbit) at least 4 times, and we own all 3 movies.  I tell you this because my title for today is "borrowed" from J.R.R. Tolkien, and because during my 1999 job search I felt a bit like Gandalf the Grey, zipping in and out of towns shrouded in mystery, not sure if I was being helpful or just being mischievous.  Very few of my friends at FUMC-K knew what I was up to.  Many of my readers have told me how unaware they were of all the turmoil in Kissimmee during the early months of the reign of The Pastor Who Shall Not Be Named (I know, I am mixing my metaphors- Voldemort just joined Gandalf in a Super Wizard combo pack!)  It makes me happy to know that the youth of FUMC-K (at that time) were not aware of what was going on.  Almost no one (sorry, Amber) knew I was looking for a new job.  We just all knew we missed Rev. John Willis terribly...

At some point in this process I was contacted by a UMC just outside of Charlotte, NC.  At the time it was one of the fastest growing churches anywhere, because it was located in an area of extreme, frenetic growth.  Houses and businesses were going up left and right within a few miles of the church.  The church had gone from 500 members to 3000 members in a few short years.  It sounded like an incredible opportunity for ministry.  I did two phone interviews with the pastor and the Search Committee and was very impressed.  They were as well.  They called back a few days later and wanted me to come up, meet the students and see if I felt God calling me back to NC.  After a few days praying about it, I told them no.

Why?  There were a couple of reasons.  Because of the amazing growth of the church, the facilities (worship space, parking, space for groups to meet in) were woefully inadequate.  They were going to spend at least the next 5 years building just to catch up.  There was going to be so much money and energy invested in those projects that it was unclear to me what would be "left over" for ministry.  I was afraid that student ministry, which is often way down the list of priorities when it comes to money, would actually get only the "left overs."  The second reason was more personal.  Marilyn and I were uncertain we wanted to go back home to NC at that point in time.  So we said no.

A few weeks later the pastor called me and asked me if I had any second thoughts.  By this time I was also involved in talks with the Union Church of Hinsdale near Chicago, and I told him I had moved on.  He asked for one more chance to change my mind.  A couple who worked with the youth (the wife had also been on the search committee) were at Walt Disney World on vacation.  He wanted to know if they could stop by and see me at my office that afternoon.  Completely caught off guard, I said yes.  They came by, and the situation was a bit awkward.  They actually met The Pastor Who Shall Not Be Named; I introduced them as friends from NC.  I have to admit listening to them almost made me change my mind.  They were very authentic and very persuasive.  I promised them I would pray about it some more, and I did.  But in the end, I still said no.  I was feeling more and more like God was calling me to Union Church.  But that's a story for next week.  Tomorrow get ready for some new Shout Outs- including information on how I might get sued!  See you then!

Because of Jesus,

The Black Hole

One of the churches that caught my attention early on in my 1999 job search was a United Methodist church located in Cincinnati.  From what I had been able to discern, they were a growing church with a solid youth ministry that had never had a full-time youth pastor.  I spoke with a woman who (along with her husband) was heading up their search effort, and several things about the position resonated with me.  After being dazzled by the New Orleans offer and the relentless pursuit of Dr. Tommy Dunbar, I felt good about this church.  I felt God leading me to explore that ministry.  I accepted their offer to fly me up for an interview.

In retrospect, there were a few warning signs before I ever got on the plane.  It turned out the church was in the suburbs of Cincinnati, but was actually located in Kentucky.  I am not sure why it bothered me that no one in the church seemed to be claiming Kentucky as home, but it did.  It also seemed a bit odd that I was going to visit this church but had yet to speak with the pastor.  I passed that off as a Search Committee doing a good job; I would meet the pastor upon arrival.  I received an agenda for the weekend by e-mail less than 24 hours before leaving, and conspicuously absent from it was any opportunity to meet any of the youth.  It just seemed a bit weird to me.  And finally, I arrived at the airport only to discover that the Cincinnati, Ohio airport is in Kentucky.   Everything just seemed a bit off.

The pastor (his name was Paul- I only remember that because I prayed for him for months afterwards...) met me at the airport and drove me to a restaurant. On the way there, he explained to me that he had been cut out of the loop on the entire youth pastor hiring process because he opposed hiring anyone.  Red Flag #1  He felt like the church could not afford a new full-time staff person.  Red Flag #2  He explained to me that the couple who were heading up the search committee had been the volunteer youth leaders for several years, and had no intentions of leaving- they just felt they needed more help.  Red Flag #3  We arrived at the restaurant and he dropped me off and left.  And that was my last conversation with Paul until I called him after I returned home.

Lunch was with several adults associated with the youth ministry, and it was pleasant enough.  Afterwards I went home with the couple in charge, and we sat around their house and talked about the future of student ministry at their church.  The backbone of the ministry had been a Puppet Ministry, which they led- and neither wanted nor needed help with.  Red Flag #4   It was their pride and joy, and really (their words) "the only thing that mattered."  The job of a new youth pastor would be to run all of the "day to day" stuff while they focused on the puppets.  There was no need for mission trips- the puppet ministry took care of that.  Red Flag #5  There was no possibility for trips of any kind- all of the money went to puppet team.  Red Flag #6  In fact, a huge part of my task would be to raise money for the puppet team.  BIG HONKIN' RED FLAG #7  And on it went, never getting any better. When I started to ask questions and mentioned the concerns Paul had shared with me, I was told not to worry about it.  They already had enough votes on the Staff-Parish (HR in a UMC) Committee to have him moved the next June.  He was a lame duck.  Red Flag #8  By the time we went to the church for my interview my only real question was "Can I fly out tonight?"  It was awful.  The committee confirmed that the new youth pastor would basically work for them.  Red Flag #9  And finally, as I by now suspected, the salary that had been discussed originally was off the table. They were offering me less that I made at FUMC-K.  Red Flag #10  Ten red flags and absolutely no contact with the youth.  This place was a student ministry Black Hole, and I wanted nothing to do with it.

The worship service the next morning was wonderful.  It turns out that Paul was quite a preacher, and very innovative as well.  I got several ideas that morning that I used a number of times later on, which prevented the trip from being a total waste of time.   By the time I flew home that afternoon, they knew I was not interested in the job- and a few of them knew why.  I did call Paul when I got home to warn him of the "coup d'etat" being planned against him.  I prayed for him.  I prayed for me.  For that one weekend, The Pastor Who Shall Not Be Named didn't seem quite so bad.  But I got over it...

Because of Jesus,

Dazzled

One sunny morning in the autumn of 1999 I arrived at my office at the First United Methodist Church of Kissimmee expecting an uneventful day.  As happens so often in ministry, I was dead wrong.  I no sooner opened my door than the intercom buzzed, and our secretary Katie told me that The Pastor Who Shall Not Be Named wanted to see me.  I headed downstairs trying to think what this visit could be about and assuming it would not be good.  This time I was correct. 

Some of the students I spent "too much time" with- 1999

I was barely seated in his office when he began to share some thoughts on our student ministry.  He had heard from "reliable sources" that some of the youth had been talking about him in a disrespectful manner.  This was true.  His "pretend tears" that seemed to come most every week in worship had turned him into somewhat of a laughing stock among the teenagers (and some of the adults, I might add).  I did not tell him this, but did say I would speak with the youth about being more supportive.  He continued on to say that he was concerned about the number of youth attending church.  I reminded him that at our lunch a month prior to that morning I had expressed concern that the youth were very disappointed at the changes he had made to worship.  He told me it was my job to make them attend.  And finally- and most unbelievably- he informed me that our summer ministries had paid far too much attention to building relationships and attracting new youth.  He wanted me to spend less time with students and more time in my office.  I was speechless.  He also informed me that we were spending too much money on students whose parents were not members of FUMC-K.  This had to stop, I was told.  I half expected him to require membership cards (like the Show Me Cards from the alternate world on FRINGE) for admission to the youth room.  When I left the office of The Pastor Who Shall Not Be Named that morning, I had a variety of names for him- none of which I can print here.  I was not asking "WWJD?"- I was thinking more along the lines of "What would Chuck Norris do?" I knew that my days in Kissimmee were numbered.

I went back up to my office and checked my e-mail, finding that several more churches had responded to my online resume.  Among those responses was one from an Episcopal church in New Orleans.  The head of their search committee had left a phone number and asked me to call him- so I did.  He told me that his committee had reviewed a number of resumes and placed mine at the top of their "wanted" list.  This was a very large church, with a huge budget for youth ministry.  He told me that the salary range was more than twice what I was currently making- at the low end.  They wanted me to fly my family in for an interview and to see the facilities (which sounded amazing) as soon as possible.  I agreed.  I was so frustrated with The Pastor Who Shall Not Be Named and so dazzled by this church that I didn't even think about it.  I just said yes.  I was to talk to Marilyn and get back to them with a date. 

And then I started thinking.  What did I know about the Episcopal church?  Very little, except the history of how it came to be.  And that was enough to remind me that this Quaker had enough problems with the hierarchy and structure of the UMC- I would never survive as an Episcopal. This was not their problem- it was my own personal preferences.  I was just beginning to truly explore contemporary worship, and this church sounded even more liturgical and traditional than FUMC-K.   I knew very little about New Orleans as well.  Realizing I had jumped the gun, I called him back and said I needed some time to pray about it.  Two days later I cancelled the trip altogether.  My search would continue.  And it would not be the last time I would be dazzled by the "things of this world" as I tried to find a place to serve God.  Tomorrow, I take my first trip for an interview- in Kentucky.  And it was a doozy...

Because of Jesus,

A Roller Coaster Ride

As I wrote about on Friday, the autumn of 1999 was a wild time in my life.   I posted my resume with some online job banks and began to receive e-mails and phone calls from all over the country.  At first I was hesitant to respond, because I loved Kissimmee and the students and adults I worked with so much.  But eventually, even that love began to give way to my frustration with The Pastor Who Shall Not Be Named.  I began to listen to some of the offers.  The roller coaster ride was beginning.  Over the next few days I will give you a behind the scenes look at some of what I was encountering.  We shall begin with Dr. Tommy Dunbar. 

I received a phone call from Dr. Tommy Dunbar petty early in the process, and he was a very impressive man.  He served as pastor of Clear Lake UMC, just outside of Houston.  Clear Lake was a large, growing congregation in need of someone to jump start their student ministry, and Dr. Tommy Dunbar thought I was just the man for the job.  I keep referring to him as Dr. Tommy Dunbar because that was how he would identify himself each and every time he would call.  And he called a lot!  He called to "sell" me on the church.  He called to tell me about all of the NASA employees, including astronauts, who lived in the Clear Lake community.  And he called- and called- to tell me what a "perfect fit" I was for their staff and their youth ministry.  He was a great guy and a good salesman.

He was, however, working against very strong opposition.  Marilyn and I had absolutely NO inclination to move to Texas.  It seemed so far away, and Houston was even hotter than Florida in the summer.  So despite his refusal to take no for an answer, I would not schedule a trip to Clear Lake for an interview.  He continued to call, even after I had accepted a position.  I think I would have loved working Dr. Tommy Dunbar- but just not in Texas.  No matter how often he called- and he called OFTEN- our decision was already made.

And therein lies a problem.  We didn't want to go because of distance and weather.  I was so wrapped up in all of the attention and the plethora of opportunities coming my way that where God was calling me got pushed to the back-burner.  I was going to make the decision.  Dr. Tommy Dunbar clearly believed God needed me in Texas.  I never stopped to listen to God's calling at the time.  I was too busy making up my own mind.  I was beginning to let it be all about me.  And I was clueless as to how far off track I was headed.   So my search continued.

One final note to this saga:  I had moved to Illinois by the following summer, when I received a call at home.  It was Dr. Tommy Dunbar.  He had been moved from Clear Lake UMC (I was so glad not to have gone through another pastoral change) to another church in Texas, and he needed a youth pastor.  I had only been at Union Church for a couple of months, but he didn't care.  He still wanted me.  By then it was too late- for both of us.  The ride continues as New Orleans comes calling tomorrow.

Becasue of Jesus,