Sometimes I Feel Like a Sad Song

Winter Week of Wonder, 2001

Those of you who know me know that I am a very upbeat person. Usually my days are full of friends, family, joy and laughter. I try hard not to get caught up in the negative things that often go on around us all. But, as the late John Denver once wrote, "Sometimes I feel like a sad song..."

Not a day goes by that I don't miss youth ministry. Some days I miss the late night phone calls, the romantic dramas and the petty disputes between youth. Some days I miss the energy and the creativity that student ministry brought to my life. Some days I miss the planning and the programs and the events. Most days I miss the teaching, the counseling and the worship. Every day I miss the students and adult volunteers who were such a huge part of my life over the years. I miss something every day. Most days the memories are a blessing. Some days I miss it so bad that it hurts. Today is one of those days. Actually every year at this time I have one of those days.

The week after Christmas was always a big week in my ministry, and as I sit here today with nothing on my schedule, Marilyn gone to NC and Will having to work, I miss it. I think back to Winter Camp at Quaker Lake in the old days. I remember Youthquake '88 in Denver and Youthquake '91 in Vermont. I remember Youth Tremors at QLC on many of the in-between years. I remember ski trips, square dancing, Winter W.O.W. (Week of Wonder), insanely powerful New Year's Eve worship services and spending time with so many special people. Twenty-four  years ago this week a group from Youth Tremors saw The Little Mermaid (in a theater) together; something that simple became a moment I will never forget. Today I remember all of these things, although I would rather not. Tomorrow I can tell you funny stories about ski trips with no snow or miniature golf in a "blizzard" at Disney World- but today it all makes me a little sad.

I'm sad because I cannot have it back. My sins have been forgiven by the grace of Jesus Christ, but forgiveness does not always mean there are no consequences for our sins. Grace is free, but it is not cheap. Jesus died for our sins. There is nothing cheap about that. On days like this I remember the consequences of my own actions and praise God that He chooses to love me anyway. 

Sometimes it's ok to feel like a sad song. We can drawn strength and wisdom from those feelings of pain and loneliness. But the good news- no, the GREAT NEWS- is that every day people sin, and every day those who profess Jesus as Lord and Savior are forgiven. God loves us every single day! And that is really something worth remembering...

Because of Jesus,